Some time ago I was given a cassette tape (that should be a fairly clear indication of how long ago) and I was eager to discover what songs were "mixed" together to transport me to a place that reminded me of the girl that I so dearly wanted to dance with.
I ran to my bedroom, closed the door and sat on my bed, I put the tape in and hit play.
"Hello, hi honey, I love you...I miss you"
It wasn't music...It was a letter. I was overcome and tears began to roll down my face. I listened as this force of nature told me what I meant to her. She was in a car...at least thats what the sounds indicated and my suspicions were confirmed when she described the stars above and said that it was cold out. I played it over and over again until it seemed that it was wearing out. I could close my eyes and recite her words with the same inflection...as the pretending evolves I find myself in her car. I now see her perfect lips shape the words and yearn to wipe the tears that stream down her face as she bares her soul in a way that I can only assume she had never done before. I smile when she smiles and I feel my heart swell.
I still have the tape and thanks to technology I converted it to CD and it is now on my iPod. I haven't seen her in years and I often wonder how she is. What our lives would have been if we had not let our pride get in the way. There are times that I look at the stars and wonder if she is seeing what I see.
Silly, I know.
But that does not prevent me from escaping into a world that I will carry in my heart until the day I die. I visit her old Corolla a couple times a year and sit next to her and watch her as she records her words that shaped who I am today. She looks over the steering wheel and looks at the park sitting in front of her on a cold December night.
I was not there and I remember every detail of the night. It is my favorite memory that I never had
I ran to my bedroom, closed the door and sat on my bed, I put the tape in and hit play.
"Hello, hi honey, I love you...I miss you"
It wasn't music...It was a letter. I was overcome and tears began to roll down my face. I listened as this force of nature told me what I meant to her. She was in a car...at least thats what the sounds indicated and my suspicions were confirmed when she described the stars above and said that it was cold out. I played it over and over again until it seemed that it was wearing out. I could close my eyes and recite her words with the same inflection...as the pretending evolves I find myself in her car. I now see her perfect lips shape the words and yearn to wipe the tears that stream down her face as she bares her soul in a way that I can only assume she had never done before. I smile when she smiles and I feel my heart swell.
I still have the tape and thanks to technology I converted it to CD and it is now on my iPod. I haven't seen her in years and I often wonder how she is. What our lives would have been if we had not let our pride get in the way. There are times that I look at the stars and wonder if she is seeing what I see.
Silly, I know.
But that does not prevent me from escaping into a world that I will carry in my heart until the day I die. I visit her old Corolla a couple times a year and sit next to her and watch her as she records her words that shaped who I am today. She looks over the steering wheel and looks at the park sitting in front of her on a cold December night.
I was not there and I remember every detail of the night. It is my favorite memory that I never had
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Cheers, then.