The horizon awaits.
The pedal is down.
8 cylinders roaring toward one future.
^^
I'm keeping that part because it's as true now as it was last time I wrote. In fact, I'd say that I'm more committed to it today than I was weeks ago. My heart is more alive now than it has been in ages. Simply put, I'm basking, and I don't plan on stopping anytime soon.
The best thing - the thing I'd forgotten or lost sight of, is the correlation between a lively heart and a lively mind. I'm not going to make any sophomoric claims regarding my absolute clarity and understanding of all things and my connection to the greater whole. The liveliness has come to me in sharper, more frequent bursts of inspiration and even simple confidence. Words flow more freely and the undiluted satisfaction I feel inside rises to the surface and tags my face with its name.
I wouldn't trade this feeling for anything.
If self-improvement is indeed masturbation, I'm gonna make that fucker in the crown of thorns cry his benevolent eyes out. I've begun taking yoga classes. Vinyasa, so far, but I may attempt other styles/methods/disciplines in the name of furthering my understanding of and ability to participate in the whole. It's been freeing to walk into classes fully aware of the fact that I know nothing and that all actions and results are progress. I haven't had this much fun being terrible at something since golf or high school sex. Today, progress included cracking the fuck out of my neck, but even that reminded me to trust my gut and listen to my body before blindly taking direction from someone who has either lost touch with their own learning process or is simply mistaken in their instruction. I may have far less education and practice in the discipline itself, but I've spend enough time in my own body to know that I should give it at least an equal voice. My body brought me to yoga, and I should listen to it much more carefully as I learn.
Above all else, my experience thus far has exposed weaknesses and deficiencies in my approach to mastering my body, resulting in a profound shift in my goals and motivations. A change was long past due, and, as such, has been more than welcome. Apparently, feeling humbled and feeling free have more in common than I ever would have imagined.
I'd also like to extend a heartfelt thank you to all of you who took the time to offer birthday tidings. They were and are most certainly needed and appreciated.
Mr. Miles Maniaci will begin the installation of my backpiece on Tuesday. Pictures will be posted. It'll be interesting to see how the process of covering the two existing tattoos (designs I love. Execution I abhore) will unfold. He began work on the drawing almost exactly a year ago, and it looks as though it will be worth the wait and then some. Miles has serious chops and Mike Malone's participation in the design process is a true honor.
I think I'm finally starting to feel the weight of the last two years lifting. After a prolonged time of approaching life from the perspective of 'endure,' I think I've finally allowed 'rejoice' to come to the forefront; its middle finger raised with the wry smile of pride and conviction.
Still standing, fuckers!
I received a wonderful package in the mail a few days ago filled with the thoughts, tastes, words and smells. When that kind of generosity of mind and spirit travels halfway around the world to arrive at your doorstep, you know that you are a very, very lucky man.
Psst.
You. Yeah, you.
C'mere a minute.
I've got something for you.
The pedal is down.
8 cylinders roaring toward one future.
^^
I'm keeping that part because it's as true now as it was last time I wrote. In fact, I'd say that I'm more committed to it today than I was weeks ago. My heart is more alive now than it has been in ages. Simply put, I'm basking, and I don't plan on stopping anytime soon.
The best thing - the thing I'd forgotten or lost sight of, is the correlation between a lively heart and a lively mind. I'm not going to make any sophomoric claims regarding my absolute clarity and understanding of all things and my connection to the greater whole. The liveliness has come to me in sharper, more frequent bursts of inspiration and even simple confidence. Words flow more freely and the undiluted satisfaction I feel inside rises to the surface and tags my face with its name.
I wouldn't trade this feeling for anything.
If self-improvement is indeed masturbation, I'm gonna make that fucker in the crown of thorns cry his benevolent eyes out. I've begun taking yoga classes. Vinyasa, so far, but I may attempt other styles/methods/disciplines in the name of furthering my understanding of and ability to participate in the whole. It's been freeing to walk into classes fully aware of the fact that I know nothing and that all actions and results are progress. I haven't had this much fun being terrible at something since golf or high school sex. Today, progress included cracking the fuck out of my neck, but even that reminded me to trust my gut and listen to my body before blindly taking direction from someone who has either lost touch with their own learning process or is simply mistaken in their instruction. I may have far less education and practice in the discipline itself, but I've spend enough time in my own body to know that I should give it at least an equal voice. My body brought me to yoga, and I should listen to it much more carefully as I learn.
Above all else, my experience thus far has exposed weaknesses and deficiencies in my approach to mastering my body, resulting in a profound shift in my goals and motivations. A change was long past due, and, as such, has been more than welcome. Apparently, feeling humbled and feeling free have more in common than I ever would have imagined.
I'd also like to extend a heartfelt thank you to all of you who took the time to offer birthday tidings. They were and are most certainly needed and appreciated.
Mr. Miles Maniaci will begin the installation of my backpiece on Tuesday. Pictures will be posted. It'll be interesting to see how the process of covering the two existing tattoos (designs I love. Execution I abhore) will unfold. He began work on the drawing almost exactly a year ago, and it looks as though it will be worth the wait and then some. Miles has serious chops and Mike Malone's participation in the design process is a true honor.
I think I'm finally starting to feel the weight of the last two years lifting. After a prolonged time of approaching life from the perspective of 'endure,' I think I've finally allowed 'rejoice' to come to the forefront; its middle finger raised with the wry smile of pride and conviction.
Still standing, fuckers!
I received a wonderful package in the mail a few days ago filled with the thoughts, tastes, words and smells. When that kind of generosity of mind and spirit travels halfway around the world to arrive at your doorstep, you know that you are a very, very lucky man.
Psst.
You. Yeah, you.
C'mere a minute.
I've got something for you.
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
hopey:
You aren't on messenger, i will call, but i am off to bed in a minute.
kristie:
Thanks for your well wishes.