Happy Valentine's Day to all of you who care about such things. I hope all of you lovelies get all the chocolate and kisses you desire. As a matter of fact, in honor of today I give you all big wet chocolate kisses!!! 
I think I'm going to make a 3 layer ice cream cake with a rich devil's food cake and coffee ice cream. What a rush that will be!
Anyway,
My study of life continues:
Ever notice a correlation between your mood and how receptive you are to external forces? I find that when I am in a good mood, or feeling optimistic, even hopeful about things I have this insatiable curiosity about the world, about people. I find myself wondering frequently, asking questions, thirsting for input and knowledge like Johnny 5.
I also find that when I am depressed and miserable I generally don't want anything from anybody. When I feel depressed I feel like a lonely old man. When I feel happy I feel silly and childlike, full of wonder and trouble.
I'm thinking of this because this weekend, I felt both. On Saturday I worked out vigorously, ate well, saw friends, met interesting people, asked questions, desired input. On Sunday, I was alone, still frustratingly trying to get my home computer operational, alone, and bored. I began to get sad. Then I began to think about my mood and the day before and yada, yada, yada.
When I feel good and the curiosity is there I have this appreciation for little things. Things like sounds, smells, beauty, new things, the unknown, etc. It's like I'm on full alert. I notice everything. I notice that a girl at work has changed her hair slightly and for the better. I need to tell her it's nice. I feel light. I feel good, right, all those wonderful things that comprise one side of the extreme spectrum of life. I suppose that when I feel pain and I'm alone and don't want to speak to anyone, that this would be the dark side. The dark side has it's beauty too, but I must admit that although I realize that I need the 2 sides for balance, I'd prefer to be on the light side. This is probably of no surprise to you.
I love the childlike glare. I've seen it in many other people's eyes. I saw it this weekend when someone surprisingly bestowed a gift upon another person in my presence. The look in their eyes was priceless. It makes me wish I could give something to all of you that you really want just to see your faces light up, but then would that be selfish of me?
I think of the Outsiders and Johnny. How he talked about "staying gold" to Pony Boy at the end. I think I want to stay gold forever. I hope we all can. Life would be so nice. Let's do it for Johnny man!
I think I'm going to make a 3 layer ice cream cake with a rich devil's food cake and coffee ice cream. What a rush that will be!
Anyway,
My study of life continues:
Ever notice a correlation between your mood and how receptive you are to external forces? I find that when I am in a good mood, or feeling optimistic, even hopeful about things I have this insatiable curiosity about the world, about people. I find myself wondering frequently, asking questions, thirsting for input and knowledge like Johnny 5.
I also find that when I am depressed and miserable I generally don't want anything from anybody. When I feel depressed I feel like a lonely old man. When I feel happy I feel silly and childlike, full of wonder and trouble.
I'm thinking of this because this weekend, I felt both. On Saturday I worked out vigorously, ate well, saw friends, met interesting people, asked questions, desired input. On Sunday, I was alone, still frustratingly trying to get my home computer operational, alone, and bored. I began to get sad. Then I began to think about my mood and the day before and yada, yada, yada.
When I feel good and the curiosity is there I have this appreciation for little things. Things like sounds, smells, beauty, new things, the unknown, etc. It's like I'm on full alert. I notice everything. I notice that a girl at work has changed her hair slightly and for the better. I need to tell her it's nice. I feel light. I feel good, right, all those wonderful things that comprise one side of the extreme spectrum of life. I suppose that when I feel pain and I'm alone and don't want to speak to anyone, that this would be the dark side. The dark side has it's beauty too, but I must admit that although I realize that I need the 2 sides for balance, I'd prefer to be on the light side. This is probably of no surprise to you.
I love the childlike glare. I've seen it in many other people's eyes. I saw it this weekend when someone surprisingly bestowed a gift upon another person in my presence. The look in their eyes was priceless. It makes me wish I could give something to all of you that you really want just to see your faces light up, but then would that be selfish of me?
I think of the Outsiders and Johnny. How he talked about "staying gold" to Pony Boy at the end. I think I want to stay gold forever. I hope we all can. Life would be so nice. Let's do it for Johnny man!
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
ladymaze:
It could be...that's one nickname for my full name. Heh.
ladymaze:
Me neither. I usually only know the first names of those I've met in person...or those who, like you, use their name as their name. Hah.