edwin

I just saw this somewhere today, thought I'd share:


"The Thermodynamics of Hell"


The following is supposedly an actual question given
on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The
answer by one student was so "profound" that the
professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet,
which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of
enjoying it as well.


Bonus Question:

Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
(absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs
using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats
when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

"First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is
changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which
souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they
are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that
once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls
are entering Hell, let's look at the different
Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these
religions state that if you are not a member of their
religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more
than one of these religions and since people do not
belong to more than one religion, we can project that
all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as
they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to
increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in
Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the
temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the
volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls
are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate
at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and
pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks
loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the
increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and
pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate has given to me by Jane
during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day
in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into
account the fact that I slept with her last night,
then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that
Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has
frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any
more souls and is therefore, extinct leaving only
heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine being
which explains why, last night, Jane kept shouting "Oh
my God."