All hail monkey 
, warrior queen, slayer of feet, demolisher of blinds, and sacred keeper of dropped q-tips!
i just had to tell everyone who's listening that my kitten , monkey, fuckin kicks ass, i have witnessed her shred every set of feet that have come through my door. she tracks, hunts, and then attacks without prejudice or remorse. as this grey lightning bolt unleashes a continual barrage of claws and kitty teeth, my friends cry out to me in pain "ow! shit, man! get yer cat away from my feet! goddamn! does she ever stop?!" their cries of anguish bring a smile to my face, you see, monkey has never looked at my feet with the eyes of a hunter. 
, warrior queen, slayer of feet, demolisher of blinds, and sacred keeper of dropped q-tips!
i just had to tell everyone who's listening that my kitten
, monkey, fuckin kicks ass, i have witnessed her shred every set of feet that have come through my door. she tracks, hunts, and then attacks without prejudice or remorse. as this grey lightning bolt unleashes a continual barrage of claws and kitty teeth, my friends cry out to me in pain "ow! shit, man! get yer cat away from my feet! goddamn! does she ever stop?!" their cries of anguish bring a smile to my face, you see, monkey has never looked at my feet with the eyes of a hunter.
laceyglove:
My old puppy Slinky used to attack all my friends that came over. He was fond of shoes and pantlegs. It'd make me laugh as well. He was just alittle weiner dog, and the horrid look on everyones face when he'd go to town, well it was just priceless! I miss him lots! 