dyspnea

You're the good things yeah that's you...
You're the icing on the cake on the table at my wake
You're the extra ton of cash on my sinking life raft
You're the loud sound of fun when I'm trying to sleep
You're the flowers on my table when my allergies come out
You're the good things...
And help's not short when you're diggin' your grave...
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so much for that section of the program...so instead a short bit about
the milkman...

in the cold mornings the milkman seems to have fallen victim to some
manner of milky madness, bringing milk sporadically on days when it is
not supposed to come...
and even when it is supposed to have stopped. it turns out however
that he is on vacation and has somebody...
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i bring absolutely nothing to the table

my best moments are bittersweet nostalgia;
memories of the excitement of new love
and the pain of love lost -
exploration, discovery, disaster, decay:
i smile as i cry and laugh as tears fall.
happiness has a rough edge.

my worst moments are nauseating fear and loathing;
hateful thoughts of wrongs comitted
and sins spoken aloud -
muttering, nightsweats, insomnia:
i scream in myself to...
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blah

DON'T - try to be the ONE - person
Who has STAYED - just to say
They never left me!
Aggravated, complicated, someone say it
God, I never learn

I have nothing left for you
you left me with nothing

(sometimes I think I'm crazy; other times I know I'm not)

i dont know what has happened (well i do) but it was just so NEEDED! the person i have been crazy about for the past 5 months is finally mine and it is amazing... "you're relaxed, you're sublime, you're amazing"...

:lov

ahh... i miss this feeling. i almost forgot what this feels like, i want it to stay like this but with all things come...
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Exhale --- Another wasted breath. Again it goes unnoticed.