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drzaius_

Ireland

Member Since 2002

Followers 18 Following 6

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Wednesday Nov 16, 2005

Nov 16, 2005
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I think the crappiest thing about getting older is the realization about how fast time passes.
More than a year ago I was looking forward to seeing the woman that I loved for Thanksgiving. I had talked to her through various internet mediums for a while beforehand. Then last Thanksgiving, the situation presented itself for me to join her, and her family, for the traditional dinner. I, to follow my stupid like manner, traveled to her stupidly hoping that I would would emerge with somesort of a meaningful relationship. Towards the end of our first physical meetinig we had sex. I like to think that both of us wanted it, I dont know if the both of us were just that desperate or I was just that pathetic that she took pity on me. It was the last night I was with her that first meeting we first fucked, she told me that she loved me and I think that I told her that I loved her. I think at the time I truly did.
Soon after she expressed her intentions to come out and visit me soon after Christmas, I was overjoyed as the pervious New Years' had been nothing but alcoholic hazes. The hopes of having the woman I loved with me was the happiest time of my life so far. The week she was here was full of sexual and emotional fulfillment, atleast on my part. Then before she left she asked me, in my foolish love drunk state, if I thought we were taking things too fast. Apparently I did and that was it. I didnt realize what had transpired untill it was too late and she was half a continent away. Ever since then my life has been crap. She has moved on with her life and I wish I could do the same.
They say no one can love someone unless you love yourself. Well what the hell happens when, YOU CAN'T love yourself??
deadly_photo:
Loving yourself is a difficult thing. But you can come to love another person, and in the process come to love yourself. It's all about giving each other the latitude...
Nov 16, 2005
lovelysitwell:
hey i dont love myself at all but you just need to appear like you do and try to pretend you feel confident.lie really and it is easier for other people to like you.you can be self loathing when you are on your own.thats what i do.
Nov 17, 2005

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