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drbensina

middle of nowhere

Member Since 2002

Followers 12 Following 7

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Wednesday May 12, 2004

May 12, 2004
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A conversation with the ex's away message:

DrBensina: Dare I ask what that's supposed to mean?

Auto response from (screen name removed): Fucking Brainwashed...it's like watching someone being tortured cannot do it anymore!

DrBensina: Because honestly? If that's even remotely about me, fuck you. If you really think I was swayed somehow by Shiloh to not like you, you're not only insanely paranoid, you're stupid. I loved you. I still love you. But you fucking hurt me. A lot. It just so happens that I had the balls to do something about it this time. I'm sorry if that makes it seem like I'm "brainwashed." And if you "can't watch", then fucking go. More power to you. I'll miss you, but I won't stop you.

DrBensina: Do you think it was easy for me to deal with the Danny issue? Do you think that didn't gnaw on me every fucking day of my life? Do you have any idea how much it sucks to feel like you can't trust the one person you've ever loved? But I did it. I went through 6 months of that, because I wanted to believe you. I wanted to believe you would never do something like that to me, certainly not a second time. I LOVED YOU, and I wanted everything to be back to normal. But it wasn't. And it won't ever be.

DrBensina: But hey, if believing I'm brainwashed is what's going to get you through this, then go right ahead. Blame Shiloh all you want. But someday, you're gonna have to face up to the truth.

DrBensina: I'm sorry it had to be this way. I certainly didn't want this. Hurting you is the last thing I've ever wanted to do, but our relationship as we knew it was over a long time ago. No, Sean didn't help, but it was just the final incident in a long string of them, and there's no getting back to the way things were.
nyhcx516:
*hug*
May 13, 2004

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