Daily Dose of Stupid
I know I have been pretty lax on my Daily Dose of Stupid blogs, but Im unemployed and except for the gym and to see my awesome girlfriend, I dont leave my house too terribly often. But on the same day that the U.S. Postal Service and AARP decided to remind me that Im getting older, Almighty God dropped comedy gold in my lap.
So I was listening to Christopher Titus' podcast today and they started covering the news when a story was read from Florida. Apparently some redneck retard had an extremely painful wart on his left hand. For whatever reason, mecidal science could do nothing for this poor Floridian, so he decided to take matters into his own hands. He thought it would be a good idea to perform a "home surgical procedure".
So this redneck Dr. House applied a local anesthetic (and by local anesthetic, I mean he went down to his local liquor store and bought himself a 12 pack). After numbing himself up good, he attempted to grip and level a 12-gauge shotgun in his right hand. He took aim at the wart on his left hand, and pulled the trigger. Amazingly enough, this actually worked. He successfully removed the painful wart
................................(wait for it)...........................
along with his entire middle finger.
WHAT A DUMBASS!!!!!!!!!
When questioned by police, what the hell he was thinking, this white trash treasure only said that he stands by his decision. I guess he isnt the least bit discouraged by his ability to now only be able to count to 9.
I will close this with a quote from my Kickboxing and JuJitsu instructor. A quote that has completely changed the way I view the world. My instructor, Kori, once said,"The only difference between Genius and Stupidity is that Genius has limits"
I know I have been pretty lax on my Daily Dose of Stupid blogs, but Im unemployed and except for the gym and to see my awesome girlfriend, I dont leave my house too terribly often. But on the same day that the U.S. Postal Service and AARP decided to remind me that Im getting older, Almighty God dropped comedy gold in my lap.
So I was listening to Christopher Titus' podcast today and they started covering the news when a story was read from Florida. Apparently some redneck retard had an extremely painful wart on his left hand. For whatever reason, mecidal science could do nothing for this poor Floridian, so he decided to take matters into his own hands. He thought it would be a good idea to perform a "home surgical procedure".
So this redneck Dr. House applied a local anesthetic (and by local anesthetic, I mean he went down to his local liquor store and bought himself a 12 pack). After numbing himself up good, he attempted to grip and level a 12-gauge shotgun in his right hand. He took aim at the wart on his left hand, and pulled the trigger. Amazingly enough, this actually worked. He successfully removed the painful wart
................................(wait for it)...........................
along with his entire middle finger.
WHAT A DUMBASS!!!!!!!!!
When questioned by police, what the hell he was thinking, this white trash treasure only said that he stands by his decision. I guess he isnt the least bit discouraged by his ability to now only be able to count to 9.
I will close this with a quote from my Kickboxing and JuJitsu instructor. A quote that has completely changed the way I view the world. My instructor, Kori, once said,"The only difference between Genius and Stupidity is that Genius has limits"
audrisa:
Wow! Is all I have to say to that. lol. And... what a good quote. I like that.
hemi:
Bummer...does that mean I can't shoot people with warts now? Darn!