i drank half of a hip flask(200ml) of jagger. i haven't drunk that much in a while. I guess I drank more last night but It was on a full stomac and it was over time. My head feels light and the world seems to glow in this warm light.
I wish this feeling would nver end. Sure I wish i was as alert as when i am sobber but this mild euphoria is worth it. I am contemplating listening to a CD. I am torn in between David Bowies "LOW" or Ima Robbot's "Monument to the masses". Both albums are awesome. I think David Bowie is more socialy acceptable than Ima Robot. I guess it is that bowie is the inovator. He is ahead of so many musical trends. He is a great. Without Bowie music would be in such a different place. I wish I could be as intelegent as Bowie. I wish i could vampiris his talent. I remember listening him to the radio as a child in France nd my mom would tell me:" this is Davi bowie. He has the first name as you." My mom's music taste as always been kinda mainstream. She is stuck into the Beatles, and johnny Hallyday, the french Elvis. I knoew this kid in middle school in France he was named Elvis. That is beside the point.
I think i need to drink more. I think i need to be on a alcohol and drug fuele writing binge. I think Baudelaire, Rimbeault and Verlaine are telling me. Hunter S thomas and Buckowski are also rooting for me to do so. I do want to write and live in this state. not that I want to self deestruct. I just feel that it si the best way to be. The warm feeling of a nice buzz is like the embrace of a woman, a hug from a relative, the gentle rays of the spring sun warming up your face.
I cannot trust any religion that does not embrace alcohol. I think Mormonism and Islam are evil. alcohol is blamed for too many things. Granted i will say that drunk driving is dangereous but as anyone ever thought of making cars that are safer to operate for drunks. They have a lexus that can paralele park by it's self but there is no drunk safe car. Granted a drunk safe car would need paralelle parking but someoone needs to work on that.
I feel lonely. i guess I realy want female companionship. Not sex, not friendship companionship. I want to have someone to go to the movies with and make out after. If there is sex afterwards great but I realy want to kiss a girl and have her hold me tight in her arms. I think making out is sexyer than sex. Don't get me wrong sex can be great but you got to like the makeout first otherwise it is just masterbation plus.
I got a calendar today and started putting impoprtant dates
---raja called---
I debated the virtues of aranged mariage with him. His mom wants to marry him off with a nice indian girl. Every conversation tends to tend that way. I think he needs to quit having such lofty views on love and marriage. i seek love but I know the dirty truth marriage is hell.
So last time I weighed my self i weighed in at 212.5 pounds, or 96.59 Kg for all you metrickids. I want to weight 180 pounds or 81 kilos. Eitherr way it means no more dought nuts and junk fod. I have to cut back on my lattes and I need to work out. Wensday I am joining a Gym.
my throught is sore. I am wearing a scarf it helps.
When I talk to raja i always tell him to hook up with females friend of ours that are experienced, shall we say. He always makes excuses that they are dieased ect... i say get vaccinated for hpv, cross your fingers for herpes and wear a rubber. I need to get the HPV vaccine. I don't want hpv. Apparently 8% of all people have HPV. Still it needs to be iradicated wiht the vaccine. Plus HPV gives women cervical cancer. I don't wat my wife or GF to get cervical cancer. Hpv is genital warts for those of you who don't know.
I just read the wikipedia article on the penis. I feel kinda dumb
I wish this feeling would nver end. Sure I wish i was as alert as when i am sobber but this mild euphoria is worth it. I am contemplating listening to a CD. I am torn in between David Bowies "LOW" or Ima Robbot's "Monument to the masses". Both albums are awesome. I think David Bowie is more socialy acceptable than Ima Robot. I guess it is that bowie is the inovator. He is ahead of so many musical trends. He is a great. Without Bowie music would be in such a different place. I wish I could be as intelegent as Bowie. I wish i could vampiris his talent. I remember listening him to the radio as a child in France nd my mom would tell me:" this is Davi bowie. He has the first name as you." My mom's music taste as always been kinda mainstream. She is stuck into the Beatles, and johnny Hallyday, the french Elvis. I knoew this kid in middle school in France he was named Elvis. That is beside the point.
I think i need to drink more. I think i need to be on a alcohol and drug fuele writing binge. I think Baudelaire, Rimbeault and Verlaine are telling me. Hunter S thomas and Buckowski are also rooting for me to do so. I do want to write and live in this state. not that I want to self deestruct. I just feel that it si the best way to be. The warm feeling of a nice buzz is like the embrace of a woman, a hug from a relative, the gentle rays of the spring sun warming up your face.
I cannot trust any religion that does not embrace alcohol. I think Mormonism and Islam are evil. alcohol is blamed for too many things. Granted i will say that drunk driving is dangereous but as anyone ever thought of making cars that are safer to operate for drunks. They have a lexus that can paralele park by it's self but there is no drunk safe car. Granted a drunk safe car would need paralelle parking but someoone needs to work on that.
I feel lonely. i guess I realy want female companionship. Not sex, not friendship companionship. I want to have someone to go to the movies with and make out after. If there is sex afterwards great but I realy want to kiss a girl and have her hold me tight in her arms. I think making out is sexyer than sex. Don't get me wrong sex can be great but you got to like the makeout first otherwise it is just masterbation plus.
I got a calendar today and started putting impoprtant dates
---raja called---
I debated the virtues of aranged mariage with him. His mom wants to marry him off with a nice indian girl. Every conversation tends to tend that way. I think he needs to quit having such lofty views on love and marriage. i seek love but I know the dirty truth marriage is hell.
So last time I weighed my self i weighed in at 212.5 pounds, or 96.59 Kg for all you metrickids. I want to weight 180 pounds or 81 kilos. Eitherr way it means no more dought nuts and junk fod. I have to cut back on my lattes and I need to work out. Wensday I am joining a Gym.
my throught is sore. I am wearing a scarf it helps.
When I talk to raja i always tell him to hook up with females friend of ours that are experienced, shall we say. He always makes excuses that they are dieased ect... i say get vaccinated for hpv, cross your fingers for herpes and wear a rubber. I need to get the HPV vaccine. I don't want hpv. Apparently 8% of all people have HPV. Still it needs to be iradicated wiht the vaccine. Plus HPV gives women cervical cancer. I don't wat my wife or GF to get cervical cancer. Hpv is genital warts for those of you who don't know.
I just read the wikipedia article on the penis. I feel kinda dumb