What am I talking about? I am so not going anonymous. Pshaw.
I am just going to do my best to avoid drama as much as I can. If I end up removing you from my friends list it is NOT because I don't like you or love you. If I do it is a drama reducing measure on my part and more than likely you will be refriended when everything blows over if not sooner.
On several more positive notes:
I start my day program at the mental hospital tomorrow. 9 am to 3 pm monday through friday of full time therapy. It will last anywhere between a week and two months depending on the progress the doctors thing I am making. I know this doesn't really sound like a positive note, but it is. I think this will be really good for me. I am really good at letting stress take over my life, and therefore I end up putting off the people I really care about because of that. I don't want to do that anymore. And there are a whole shit ton load of issues that I need to talk about to professionals.
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I talked to Robbie tonight. I called him at around three thirty in the morning, completely unsure of whether he would be awake or not. He was. We talked for a really long time and towards the end of the conversation I said to him "Robbie, I love you. And when I say that I mean that I care about you intensely and you will always be a part of me." There was a short pause and he said "I am at a loss for words." He then proceeded to talk about how he couldn't imagine not having the support system that he has and that he really feels for me, etc. I then told him that he could have just said "I love you too." He said that would be too easy. We talked for a little while longer and at the end of the conversation I said "I love you" and he said "I love you too."
And it wasn't weird or awkward or heavy or anything. It was just right. And it felt really good. I am glad that after being apart for two years we can finally say that to each other. Because he really is my best friend beyond anyone else in the world.
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It is one of my besteset friends in the whole wide worlds birthdays today!! Everyone go wish Stellar happy birthday. Her handle is really completely appropriate. She is a stellar lady. She is wonderful and kind and smart and calm and our friendship means so much to me.
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Happy VALENTINES DAY!
I, unlike many, really like Valentines Day. I think that any opportunity or excuse to celebrate love in its variety of forms should be taken.
And although I thought that this would be my first valentine -less valentines day since 2001, at the last minute I got myself a valentine!
So I send hugs and sweet kisses to MrDeity, who most definitely deserves them.
I am just going to do my best to avoid drama as much as I can. If I end up removing you from my friends list it is NOT because I don't like you or love you. If I do it is a drama reducing measure on my part and more than likely you will be refriended when everything blows over if not sooner.
On several more positive notes:
I start my day program at the mental hospital tomorrow. 9 am to 3 pm monday through friday of full time therapy. It will last anywhere between a week and two months depending on the progress the doctors thing I am making. I know this doesn't really sound like a positive note, but it is. I think this will be really good for me. I am really good at letting stress take over my life, and therefore I end up putting off the people I really care about because of that. I don't want to do that anymore. And there are a whole shit ton load of issues that I need to talk about to professionals.
---
I talked to Robbie tonight. I called him at around three thirty in the morning, completely unsure of whether he would be awake or not. He was. We talked for a really long time and towards the end of the conversation I said to him "Robbie, I love you. And when I say that I mean that I care about you intensely and you will always be a part of me." There was a short pause and he said "I am at a loss for words." He then proceeded to talk about how he couldn't imagine not having the support system that he has and that he really feels for me, etc. I then told him that he could have just said "I love you too." He said that would be too easy. We talked for a little while longer and at the end of the conversation I said "I love you" and he said "I love you too."
And it wasn't weird or awkward or heavy or anything. It was just right. And it felt really good. I am glad that after being apart for two years we can finally say that to each other. Because he really is my best friend beyond anyone else in the world.
----
It is one of my besteset friends in the whole wide worlds birthdays today!! Everyone go wish Stellar happy birthday. Her handle is really completely appropriate. She is a stellar lady. She is wonderful and kind and smart and calm and our friendship means so much to me.
---
Happy VALENTINES DAY!
I, unlike many, really like Valentines Day. I think that any opportunity or excuse to celebrate love in its variety of forms should be taken.
And although I thought that this would be my first valentine -less valentines day since 2001, at the last minute I got myself a valentine!
So I send hugs and sweet kisses to MrDeity, who most definitely deserves them.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
there's one more week for your chance to win it
the day program seems like it will be helpful, hope it can help you reorganize and make the changes you need to make to move forward.