dolorian

i'm having a really hard time adjusting to the time zone thing. i'm all wired and my hands are shaking but i think thats from something else...so you wanna hear about my trip?
day 1, we drove straight to kentucky from PA and took a 2 hour tour of mammoth cave. (which i do not suggest for anyone who is claustrophobic with an anxiety disorder) it was really cool after the first half spent trying to convince myself that i wasn't going to be buried alive 250 ft underground by an earthquake. there's a section though, where the walls are covered in some sort of stuff (i wasn't really paying attention to details) and was like "Dad! the walls look like they're covered in \m/ melted skin \m/" in my death metal voice... dad's like "uhhh... what's wrong with you?" haha... he asked me that alot, now that i think of it...
so then off to memphis so dad can tour graceland. you know, i counted 3 goat skulls in elvis' house? i had no idea he was so rad.
while in arkansas we camped in a campground in a very small town (which, by the way, i've mastered camping i think) oh that's such a lie! it was more like "EW!!! DAD!!! KILL IT!!!" haha... dad's the squish mastah. i even wrote him a squish mastah theme song. so in arkansas i saw a store advertising "ground bibles". ground? as in the past tense of grind? how evil would it be to eat a bible on a bun with ketchup? i think that got me a "what's wrong with you?" from dad again.
uhh... i forget what other states i drove through... i remember the top little square thingy of texas 'cause i saw 2 cowboys in a gas station. they clink when they walk cause of the spurs on their boots. i wanna clink when i walk. think i can put spurs on my combat boots? oh! then my favorite place ever was the grand canyon. i saw a really pretty girl sitting alone on a rock, looking down, listening to something on her walkman. i so wanted to know what she was listening to and what she was thinking about. she looked like she wanted to be left alone, so i didn't. i probably would have been dissapointed anyway.
i saw a sign for highway 666 and shiprock while in new mexico. wish i coulda takin a picture, but i was driving and dad was sleeping. i obsessed over that damn movie the whole time, too. especially after my conversation with chad a few hours before i left PA. he ended up driving all the way to my mom's house in the middle of the night to bring me a painting he'd made for me. we sat on the back deck for hours talking about stuff. life, love, old friends, the stars, goblins...hehe. you know he told me once that he loves me. i called him a liar. cause that's what i do. or i freak out and run away... which i've also done recently... anyway. my fortune cookie the other day said "don't doubt your own lovability" and realized that i do. if someone says that to me, i usually just think they're trying to get something from me... but now i believe him. a few hours before i moved 3,000 miles away, i believe him. he proved it to me because he had no reason to try and make me believe him. it's not like he was just trying to sleep with me 'cause he already was. and he knew i was leaving... i don't know. blah blah blah.
definately my longest journal EVER! let's see who likes me enough to read the whole thing... i'm bored and lonely. i wonder if Kira's still awake? well, i'm about to wake her ass up if she's not. ha!
xoxo