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dollierocker

Wilmington, DE

Member Since 2007

Followers 45 Following 47

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Sunday Apr 18, 2010

Apr 18, 2010
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i'm feeling...uh...very "blah".

just as i suspected she would, the doc has added more drugs to the cocktail i already take on a daily basis. everyone i've seen is convinced that i have extreme panic disorder and this has cause the physical symptoms i've been experiencing. and that is on TOP of bi-polar, the diagnosis of which still stands. it's all rather confusing and depressing.

on top of that, i'm still at home with the parents and i am in no rush to return to phoenix. my life was getting so lame out there that the bad times outweighed the good by a huge margin. i may be bored her with the folks, but at least i feel safe and well taken care of. danni wants to move into a safer, better house. and we'll likely be dumping our roommate, which sucks because she also happens to be my best friend.

and the very worst bit of news: last thursday we had to put our dog of 14 years down. she just got blindsided with illness that day, and we just knew it was time. still, watching her die on that cold table made it hard not to think that i KILLED her. but as time goes on i realize that she was indeed in a lot of pain and was already dying. my poor daddy is taking it super hard. they were best friends. he and i cried a million tears.

...i need a little sunshine in my life!

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