After a night's worth of tears and discussion, the fiancee and I are officially over for a while. We spent so much time loving the fact that we are in love, we neglected to build a friendship or a solid relationship that could stand the test of time and trouble. So, we are going to be completely apart for a while, and focus on building...
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loismustdie:
i think you made a wise decision... you're still young and you need to know yourself before you make such a large commitment...
loismustdie:
just from your last post, it didn't sound like the best relationship.. not saying that's anyone's fault, i just think that if two people aren't willing to work together, then there really isn't any point... still, let me know if you wanna chat... just email me!
ok...I have a feeling this is going to be a two times in one day update, so maybe I'm finally doing a good job on making sure all of you know the ins and outs of my silly little mundane life.
Today at work, I smoked a black and mild cigar with the dock workers. They told me I was the coolest broad they'd ever...
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Today at work, I smoked a black and mild cigar with the dock workers. They told me I was the coolest broad they'd ever...
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surfbetty:
P.I.M.P....Put-it-in-my-pocket...at least that is what MTV's Big Pimpin show said..... 
Well, here I am again! I miss updating everyday, but I am so tired when I get home from work that I just end up going straight to bed. Such a boring life I lead.
While my new haircolor (I believe it's called sultry salsa- it's a red brown color) is setting, I'll update.
The now ex-fiancee is moving out this weekend. I'm kind of...
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While my new haircolor (I believe it's called sultry salsa- it's a red brown color) is setting, I'll update.
The now ex-fiancee is moving out this weekend. I'm kind of...
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samanthakayne:
good fuckin news all the way around - props to you for the school decision. i made a similar one (albeit teaching, not art) and am still happy with my choice. well, most days, but that's all you can ask, right?
re: living alone... man - last summer when i moved out was the first time in my life i'd ever (ever) lived alone... and i am so damn spoiled to it now!!!
take care of yourself, and if all your upcoming traveling lures you out to CO, so much the better
re: living alone... man - last summer when i moved out was the first time in my life i'd ever (ever) lived alone... and i am so damn spoiled to it now!!!
take care of yourself, and if all your upcoming traveling lures you out to CO, so much the better
Well, after a long long talk with my fiancee, we decided that we needed some time apart. He had been thinking that we moved too fast for a little while and wasn't sure what do to fix it or what to say to me because he thought I wouldnt' understand. So, we decided that we were going to go back to square one, just dating,...
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delirium_faerie:
i'm so happy for you! it sounds like everything will work out between you two and that this is really what you both need.
samanthakayne:
honey, i'm happy to do absolutely anything i can, and don't forget it, k?
if you're right about this relationship, and it seems to me like you are, then this time and space will give you both the room to be honest with each other about just how much you do love each other and do want from each other... and that's always a good thing.
take care of you. and him, some, too
if you're right about this relationship, and it seems to me like you are, then this time and space will give you both the room to be honest with each other about just how much you do love each other and do want from each other... and that's always a good thing.
take care of you. and him, some, too
OK, here's all the drama I mentioned to a couple of you. Aside from my truck driver friend breaking his back, my fiancee and i have been fighting tons and tons. He's been treating me terribly lately, and I'm getting to the point now where I just can't deal with it anymore. I think we rushed into everything a little bit and now we're stuck....
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loismustdie:
My best friend says I know what I need to do and I need to be strong and put faith in that things will work out.
hmm... okay... if you guys can begin to burn out after nine months, i question whether it really is there for you... couples go through periods of ups and downs but if you can't even communicate during a down period, then you have serious problems... you're young, hon... keep that in mind... if you think that the 2 of you jumped in too quickly, then you need to back the fuck out for a little while... "love is not love that alters when it alteration finds, or bends with the remover to remove..." if you are finding interest in others already because you think they treat you better or for any other reason, then it's probably just not there for you... and you can't FORCE love... you can't force a relationship...
okay, that's all i'm gonna type for now... if you want to chat, email me your phone # or aim username, etc... i have free long distance and i'm almost always home...
oh, loismustdie is a family guy reference...
and i'll be moving home in june or july...
hmm... okay... if you guys can begin to burn out after nine months, i question whether it really is there for you... couples go through periods of ups and downs but if you can't even communicate during a down period, then you have serious problems... you're young, hon... keep that in mind... if you think that the 2 of you jumped in too quickly, then you need to back the fuck out for a little while... "love is not love that alters when it alteration finds, or bends with the remover to remove..." if you are finding interest in others already because you think they treat you better or for any other reason, then it's probably just not there for you... and you can't FORCE love... you can't force a relationship...
okay, that's all i'm gonna type for now... if you want to chat, email me your phone # or aim username, etc... i have free long distance and i'm almost always home...
oh, loismustdie is a family guy reference...
and i'll be moving home in june or july...
delirium_faerie:
i'm sorry that things are all crazy like that! loismustdie has good advice, so i second that. take some time to breathe and figure things out. i'm a firm believer that if things are meant to be then you will find a way. if you feel like you need to take things slow, the future will still be there further down the road. you don't have to get married now. if you really feel like you love him, then you'll still love him later. if you need time then you'll still love him after that. listen to your heart and your head. they both have good things to say. i'm going to stop now, before i ramble on too much more. but if you need to talk, i'm around.
Ok, soooo long time no be on website. 
Had a smallish problem with my internet service phone line provider people, but it's all fixed now.
My driver crush broke his back a week or so ago...out of work for 6 months. He is having surgery this week to get bone shards removed from his spinal column. Bad bad bad stuff.
I got my new tattoo...a...
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Had a smallish problem with my internet service phone line provider people, but it's all fixed now.
My driver crush broke his back a week or so ago...out of work for 6 months. He is having surgery this week to get bone shards removed from his spinal column. Bad bad bad stuff.
I got my new tattoo...a...
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samanthakayne:
wb!
just tell me you didn't break the boy's back, and it's okay...
fairies are good... naked's even better
just tell me you didn't break the boy's back, and it's okay...
fairies are good... naked's even better
samanthakayne:
k... but you should know that if you tempt me with somethin like that, i'm not super patient... lol... i'll be stalking your journal now 
OK so this working until 3:30 am business is killing me and my fiancee. He tries to stay up and wait for me to get home, then he only gets like, 5 hours of sleep before his day starts and we still only get a few minutes together. Work sucks. This is why I need to become a professional pin-up girl and then work will...
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delirium_faerie:
your angel and devil tattoos sound like they'd be really cool.
samanthakayne:
(sets up a chant, encouraging others to join in)
pictures
pictures
pictures
pictures
okay, in all seriousness - those tats sound way cool. i'm hungry to get new ink, but haven't decided what to do next. got more backpiece to be done, i really want to get something delicate and feminine somewhere (prob feet ). just too many ideas... lol
be good...
pictures
pictures
pictures
pictures
okay, in all seriousness - those tats sound way cool. i'm hungry to get new ink, but haven't decided what to do next. got more backpiece to be done, i really want to get something delicate and feminine somewhere (prob feet
). just too many ideas... lol
be good...
OK, so the thought of the day after I have had sleep is this...one of my drivers told me I looked like Lillie Munster with my hair black with the streaks in it. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't the bride of Frankenstein have black hair with one white streak in the middle, not black hair with pink streaks on each side?
I...
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I...
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xhollowedheartx:
you're so cute! hehehe and yes.. it's cruelty to grasshoppies
xhollowedheartx:
not much is up... AND YES YOU DO NEED PICS!! but i already know you're beautiful. how are you!? do you have aim or yahoo or msn?
but i already know you're beautiful. how are you!? do you have aim or yahoo or msn?work work work...that's all I do. Well, work and flirt with my trucker and my baby. so, i guess it all evens out. i like flirting...it's an art form.
you know, motives are a very funny thing. i like motives....well, good motives anyway. motives like greed and money and stuff like that really aren't fair. motives like friendship and a good time and those...those are...
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you know, motives are a very funny thing. i like motives....well, good motives anyway. motives like greed and money and stuff like that really aren't fair. motives like friendship and a good time and those...those are...
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loismustdie:
don't have anything to give ya... we're trying to move home... and i still need to get a tattoo of my own!
samanthakayne:
you're so right re: monogamy... especially where girls are concerned. especially.
and glad you liked the story! there's a longer (and, er, a bit more graphic) one for the last entry in March. i'm gonna try to post a full length one each month... i just have to be motivated enough to write them.
--um, edited 'cause i accidentally removed you from my friend list
reapprove me?
[Edited on Apr 06, 2004 12:37PM]
and glad you liked the story! there's a longer (and, er, a bit more graphic) one for the last entry in March. i'm gonna try to post a full length one each month... i just have to be motivated enough to write them.
--um, edited 'cause i accidentally removed you from my friend list
reapprove me? [Edited on Apr 06, 2004 12:37PM]
work work work....blah fucking blah...i got a kick ass skirt today. think i might use it in my set.
loismustdie:
i hear ya on the blah fuckin blah part...
sensefield:
lol blah blah fukin blahahahah
What an insanely interesting and out of the ordinary night I had last night. This ongoing flirtation I have with my truck driver is getting extremely intense...and I really like it. The idea that I am testing the limits of my relationship with my fiancee and expanding both our ideas on sex and love and open-minded experimentation is also a huge turn on. The human...
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loismustdie:
i don't think i could handle 17 hours straight... be bored out of my mind... glad you're happy, tho!
zombiebite83:
you have a truck driver? nice.
OK, so I definitely have a solid idea for my set, I just have to get the ball rolling now. Yay! Hopefully it will turn out as hot as I hope. I think I'm going to go ahead and get my next tattoo first though...I think it will enhance what I want to do.
Things are going pretty decent today...really tired, but thats what happens...
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Things are going pretty decent today...really tired, but thats what happens...
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loismustdie:
good luck!
loismustdie:
too cute...
thanx!
thanx!