Well my weekend has started right now!! hooray.
Since i`m on an economy drive i`ve been drinking cheap white wine, mmmm novel. i whent into a nation wide shop chain known as "alldays" (well 8am till 11pm) i picked up 2 bottles of californian white it instantly made me think ofDblFstedBeenonza I`ll now explain that comment since i`ve never actually met her in the flesh...ahem.... Californian white wine is in california, (is everyone still with me..??) DblFstedBeenonza is in california therefore its must be punk as fuck to drink blossom hill`s finest shite (sorry) white wine ta daaaa!
i`m now about half way through my first bottle, it reminds me of when i got so pissed i tried to eat my leather jacket, (ask vampsinthe78 he was there!!) so its got a kind of 2 year old guiness/stale newkie brown/lager/sweat/leather texture mixed with hollyhocks (all you brits think jilly goulden) its foul but at 5 for 2 bottles ya can`t go wrong.
Stickin to the subject of you yanks i think i upset one of your lot today at work (i work for a good ol` god fearin, flag wavin, Ma`s apple pie eatin american company) you don`t seem to understand irony or sarcasm that well do you?? i mean this guy didn`t and the last 2 guys before didn`t either, they sent out a "time and motion" bloke out from Arizona to see how the typical forklift truck driver spends his day within the warehouse so they lumped me with him tonight, fucking jesus . that was my first mistake "taking the lords name in vain" bad move kevo he`s a devout christian.
then came my extraordinary methods of making space in the "holding deck" by smashing the fuck out of expensive things just to make sure my stuff ended up on the next box out of blighty, then came my statutory 15 minuite break, where i sit in the cabin smoking my little head off cursing the good name of "our lord jesus christ" and cracking various jokes about the other lads in the brew room which he asked me to explain later on....for fucks sake its not ard! when i say to one of the lads "mickey" "oi oi mickey lad i ad ya mam last night, say hi to ya da hes next" that doesn`t actually mean i went to his mothers house and engaged in sexual intercourse with here then i`m off to rape his dad tomorrow it`s just the way the foul mouthed working class mind ...works?
i impressed him when i made him a brew for anyone who doesn`t know me proppa i like my tea with tea in it vurtually black with just a drop of milk and 2 sugars so i subjected him to a cup of proppa northern coal miners/boiler makers tea
i think he liked it, or he was just to scared to argue with a guy who has ten tons of titainium through his nose and shouts any thing or anybody who gets in his way.
i think i did ok i`ve not been fired and hes coming back to assess me on my "people management skills" on monday, it shouldn`t take long i aint got none!!!!!
on the up side he did learn to speak propper, i taught him most of the crazy Widnes/Lancashire accent i apparently have i didn`t even know i had an accent till he came along the cheeky cunt!!! how fucken hard is it (Mom, Mum, Mam)
fuck `em
"I`m reet Buggered, so am off ta drain me pinter wine, see thee later muvver fuckkers"
(translates as "One is quite tired, so I am going to finish ones pint glass of wine. See you all later, take care Motherfuckers"
ta ra
Since i`m on an economy drive i`ve been drinking cheap white wine, mmmm novel. i whent into a nation wide shop chain known as "alldays" (well 8am till 11pm) i picked up 2 bottles of californian white it instantly made me think ofDblFstedBeenonza I`ll now explain that comment since i`ve never actually met her in the flesh...ahem.... Californian white wine is in california, (is everyone still with me..??) DblFstedBeenonza is in california therefore its must be punk as fuck to drink blossom hill`s finest shite (sorry) white wine ta daaaa!
i`m now about half way through my first bottle, it reminds me of when i got so pissed i tried to eat my leather jacket, (ask vampsinthe78 he was there!!) so its got a kind of 2 year old guiness/stale newkie brown/lager/sweat/leather texture mixed with hollyhocks (all you brits think jilly goulden) its foul but at 5 for 2 bottles ya can`t go wrong.
Stickin to the subject of you yanks i think i upset one of your lot today at work (i work for a good ol` god fearin, flag wavin, Ma`s apple pie eatin american company) you don`t seem to understand irony or sarcasm that well do you?? i mean this guy didn`t and the last 2 guys before didn`t either, they sent out a "time and motion" bloke out from Arizona to see how the typical forklift truck driver spends his day within the warehouse so they lumped me with him tonight, fucking jesus . that was my first mistake "taking the lords name in vain" bad move kevo he`s a devout christian.
then came my extraordinary methods of making space in the "holding deck" by smashing the fuck out of expensive things just to make sure my stuff ended up on the next box out of blighty, then came my statutory 15 minuite break, where i sit in the cabin smoking my little head off cursing the good name of "our lord jesus christ" and cracking various jokes about the other lads in the brew room which he asked me to explain later on....for fucks sake its not ard! when i say to one of the lads "mickey" "oi oi mickey lad i ad ya mam last night, say hi to ya da hes next" that doesn`t actually mean i went to his mothers house and engaged in sexual intercourse with here then i`m off to rape his dad tomorrow it`s just the way the foul mouthed working class mind ...works?
i impressed him when i made him a brew for anyone who doesn`t know me proppa i like my tea with tea in it vurtually black with just a drop of milk and 2 sugars so i subjected him to a cup of proppa northern coal miners/boiler makers tea
i think he liked it, or he was just to scared to argue with a guy who has ten tons of titainium through his nose and shouts any thing or anybody who gets in his way.
i think i did ok i`ve not been fired and hes coming back to assess me on my "people management skills" on monday, it shouldn`t take long i aint got none!!!!!
on the up side he did learn to speak propper, i taught him most of the crazy Widnes/Lancashire accent i apparently have i didn`t even know i had an accent till he came along the cheeky cunt!!! how fucken hard is it (Mom, Mum, Mam)
fuck `em
"I`m reet Buggered, so am off ta drain me pinter wine, see thee later muvver fuckkers"
(translates as "One is quite tired, so I am going to finish ones pint glass of wine. See you all later, take care Motherfuckers"
ta ra
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
vampsinthe78:
Man. Check my journal out. All bad... 
brogan:
I was walking down the street last night drinking cheap ass wine from the bottle,damn i felt so punk rock hahaha &bmx bmx bmx when can i steal u dogboy?!!
&bmx bmx bmx when can i steal u dogboy?!!