I have to remember to take it as a compliment that everyone wants me to do everything. There's really no more I can say about this topic without sounding like either a whiny bitch or a cocky asshole, so I guess I'll just leave it up to interpretation.
Those emails they used to send to my whole department at work... now they only come to my inbox. Whereas they used to ask for anyone to get something done or answer a question... now they come to me first. Unfortunately I don't know how to say no... and I always learn about my personal limitations the hard way. It doesn't help that people come to me personally and say they wouldn't trust anyone else to help them out (this last part applies both to work and my personal life). It's a pattern that keeps happening with most things I do. Now if only I could pick one thing and stick to it I might start earning a hefty compensation for my efforts. Of course that means I'd have to find something that I love doing enough to keep putting my all into it even after it starts wearing me down. But of course I'm always trying to do everything I can to make everybody happy. I really need to learn how to start saying no. It's a fault I've had all of my life. One my mother tried to reak me of, but could never quite do. I've spent the majority of my life held to unreasonable expectations... the unfortunate part of this is that I keep meeting those expectations... aand it's never enough.
So much for not being whiny or cocky.
On another note... the beta site is pretty, but it might take me a minute to get used to the new navigation. I'm sure it will come with time though.
Lastly... pretty soon I'm going to have to start actively looking for female companionship. It'd be nice after days like today to have someone to cuddle with. Also a steady girlfriend would help keep me out of trouble. That's all I have to say about that though. Now that I'm getting my shit together I'm almost confident enough to feel like I have something to offer in a relationship... almost. Things can only get better from here though if I just stay on the right path and stick to the plan. Here's hoping I don't majorly fuck up anytime soon as I'm prone to doing.
In the meantime... I'm still lonesome. I'm trying to drown myself in busywork, but feel free to bother me anytime.
Those emails they used to send to my whole department at work... now they only come to my inbox. Whereas they used to ask for anyone to get something done or answer a question... now they come to me first. Unfortunately I don't know how to say no... and I always learn about my personal limitations the hard way. It doesn't help that people come to me personally and say they wouldn't trust anyone else to help them out (this last part applies both to work and my personal life). It's a pattern that keeps happening with most things I do. Now if only I could pick one thing and stick to it I might start earning a hefty compensation for my efforts. Of course that means I'd have to find something that I love doing enough to keep putting my all into it even after it starts wearing me down. But of course I'm always trying to do everything I can to make everybody happy. I really need to learn how to start saying no. It's a fault I've had all of my life. One my mother tried to reak me of, but could never quite do. I've spent the majority of my life held to unreasonable expectations... the unfortunate part of this is that I keep meeting those expectations... aand it's never enough.
So much for not being whiny or cocky.
On another note... the beta site is pretty, but it might take me a minute to get used to the new navigation. I'm sure it will come with time though.
Lastly... pretty soon I'm going to have to start actively looking for female companionship. It'd be nice after days like today to have someone to cuddle with. Also a steady girlfriend would help keep me out of trouble. That's all I have to say about that though. Now that I'm getting my shit together I'm almost confident enough to feel like I have something to offer in a relationship... almost. Things can only get better from here though if I just stay on the right path and stick to the plan. Here's hoping I don't majorly fuck up anytime soon as I'm prone to doing.
In the meantime... I'm still lonesome. I'm trying to drown myself in busywork, but feel free to bother me anytime.
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"That's right I'm alive and I'm madder than a hornet in a behive."
tonight, I take on Koreatown.