djsilverman

This girl I've been hanging out with just hit on me and I almost took her up in a moment of weakness. Welcome to the world of sobriety folks!! I knew that I wasn't really into her and I didn't feel like I wanted to hook up with her. Lately, it seems like that's the case with me. I know what kind of girl I'm attracted to and she's not it. It's not that I'm unrealistic. I just need chemistry!! There's a girl that's coming back into Richmond in the next couple of weeks. And I've been holding out to see her. She spent her summer as a camp counselor and I'd really like to date her. We'll see if it works out. I'm not putting alot of pressure on the situation. I think my head's more fucked up by Kate(the ex) then anythng else because, 1 I'm still a little obsessed with her, 2 because she lives across the fucking street from me(and still doesn't see why that was a fucked up thing, and 3 she's already seeing another guy. The worst part about our relationship was that I'm a fucking sexual dynamo and she's as sexualy cold as they come!! It always made me feel really bad about myself. The whole 4 years we were going out I never really felt like she reciprocated my physical and emotional love.

Whew. That feels like a load off. I'm still reeling from my friend telling me she 'didn't really want to go home yet'. FUCK. Aren't there any nice girls out there who can fix my fucking head up and give me what I need?! Some really fucking hot god damn sex, cuddling, and good conversation!!! But first, CHEMISTRY!!!!