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djdrj

Suburbia, IL (think Breakfast Club)

Member Since 2004

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Sunday Apr 24, 2005

Apr 24, 2005
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OK, I'm feeling moderately better, I just got thrown into a sad funk and woke up feeling horrible. I drove out to the coast and watched the seals playing in the water for a while, that made me feel a little better. Still frown but not it such a bad way.

First I find out yesterday that my cousins wife had some rediculous amount of fluid removed from around her heart because lung cancer is killing her. I knew about the cancer, so this was just the latest in that sad saga. Then I ended up having a late night talk with one of my friends from Oakland and it just brought out lots of sad emotions. First of all my friend who is supposed to be going to drug counciling every week was staying up all night cleaning her house and smoking crystal. I was in a really good mood after having people over to hang out at my house (a rarity) and returned her phone call, and somehow it turned into a super long discussion about my ex-girlfriend. So that deflated me I suppose and I woke up today not wanting to get out of bed or do anything really.

It's just a frown day.



VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
spanoonoos:
tanx yer reel smart smile but seriously, as silly as it may seem i do need to be reminded periodicaly that he is abusive & wrong. as with most abusers/bullies he is also sometimes wonderful & as i am packing up our things i am finding stuff that reminds me of the good & that's hard.

but the little scene @ jerry's yesterday helped to remind me of why i started all this in the 1st place. (i wish i had a picture of the paint guy's face. his reaction was priceless.) i was actually so angry that if i was i guy i would have knocked the consumer of resources "the fuck out." but instead i shut my mouth & walked away like big girl.

i'll take your word on the tweeker. smile kudoos to you for trying to make totally fresh start, but poo-poos to her for getting in the middle. that's not the kind of 3some most people are looking for. wink (sorry i gotta make jokes or i'll go crazy...)
Apr 25, 2005
spanoonoos:
ohmygodwhatever!!!!!!!!!!!!! are we twins from a reverse paralell universe? ha!

let's get mr. agro & ms. p.a. together so they can have a lovely manic life together. he was 1 of my favorite people, i mean i picked him for crying out loud!!! of course when we were dating he was angel & NEVER acted like like an angry idiot.

but now the bad outweighs the good & i know i need some space from it. taking that trip really helped me to see that i am happier not being affixed to or living with him. i wish i could blame his behavior on drugs: that would be a an easier fix than this behavior he learned from his family.

it's all so typical...well at least i know i'm "normal" surreal
Apr 26, 2005

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