djbq

ok.
so.
one STRESSFUL week at work.
i think the heat has gone to people's heads - mine included.
let me just give 2 examples -
wed the filament blew in our x-ray machine. we could still take films, but they were VERY light, so you had to jack up the MAS and KVP to get a decent film - blasting the patient w/ way more radiation than necessary, but at least you could get an idea of what was going on inside.
so, thrs tech comes to fix machine. turns out there's more than just a blown filament - the repairs go on for hours - the end product being a BUSTED x-ray machine on the day before the busiest holiday weekend of the year.
in case you can't guess, an emergency hospital w/ no x-ray machine is up shit creek w/out a paddle.
case in point - thrs we had 2 hit-by-cars come in. one was stable but obviously broken in the back - leg, pelvis, kind of fractures? who knows. second one busted front leg and resp distress, either pneumothorax or contusions, couldn't tell. so, surgeon loads up her truck w/ 2 dogs, 2 techs, portable O2, ET tube and ambu bag and drives over to another hospital owned by the same people to take x-rays. fucked up.
fri has to do surgery on the one dog (fx femur) at the other hospital, b/c you have to take post-op films while the dog is anesthatized - can't be driving back and forth, of course. which means she has to take at least one tech w/ her (from an already skeleton holiday crew) plus all the packs and drugs she might need b/c no one knows where anything is at the other hospital.
riCOCKulous!
then fri, i am in the mts celebrating america's independence from england and i get a message from the hospital that i fucked up the holiday schedule.
i hate being responsible - b/c when you're responsible and y ou fuck up you fuck up other people's lives.
i hate having a conscience - b/c when you fuck up other people's lives you feel like SHIT - and it ruins your whole holiday weekend.
i hate having low self-esteem - b/c when you fuck up other people's lives you worry that they are going to hold a grudge and you care very much that these people like you and you hate the idea of people being mad at you.

so, today was better.
bought chocolats for the people i screwed over by being a scheduling retard.
found some pants that actually fit my mass-challenged husband (size 28 waist)
bought 2 pairs of great new shoes (one high heeled which i never wear) and a girly new skirt and wore them around town to go music and book shopping and felt very pretty.
bought a bunch of new cds and some books and magazines - in the tattoo research venue.
all in all, i highly recommend shopping therapy for anyone who is feeling bad.
for any reason.

more later.
eat now.
vega