dixxxon

so, this tonsill thing hasn't gone so well. i've had i get re-cauterized 3 fucking times. this entails blood spurting, ( yes, i said spurting) from the wound sites in the back of my throat, then going to the emergency room where i get an IV, lots of blood drawn, and then the real fun begins. sometimes with morphine, sometimes without. they have used silver- nitrate 2 times, but once, they had to use an evil, demonic, electric cauterizing machine from hell. this was the most painful, voilent experience i have had to date. i had to be held down. i've never heard myself scream like that. i smelled my own burning flesh.

i am traumatized.

its been 13 days since the surgery and im still not eating. i've been surviving on ice, sugar water, and the occasional Ensure suppliment drink. today i tried wonton soup. i could only sip down a few ounces of the broth but i ate the noodle wraper from 1 wonton! hey, thats pretty good for me, considering. lord knows when i'll make it back to work. my Dr.s keep saying that they have NEVER seen this happen to anyone after a routine tonsillectomy.

pray for me.


in other news, after years of diliberation, i have decided to get my first tattoos covered up. i dont think you can even see them in anyof my pictures but they are 2 ugly, poorly exicuted tribals that stretch horizontally across my back and wraps around my right side. i know, tribal. hey, some of us had to turn 18 in the mid- 90's. i figured i would just live with it becauce , after all, i did it to myself. but you know, maybe i don't have to carry evey bad desision with me untill i die.

which leads right in to some other news. i just got a notice in the mail yesterday. my divorce has finalized. and to that i say...


HALLELUJAH!!!