discordia

For a long time i lived in a kind of surrealism. As if in a dream, one without sence, in a state of inertia and survival. I didn't care about people , even the ones i loved most , i didn't care about evolution at any level . Waiting for the days to end. . . Waiting for nothing at all.
Now I feel that I awoke from a bad taste dream .
I lose control on my life . I do not feel fulfilled with my work . My ex got tired of my nose-up atitude , my sweet gramma (that took care of me since very young) is very sick. . . Everything is falling unto pieces and i feel so powerless cuz is nothing i can do , nothing i can change, nothing i can correct. . .

i never like to hear people complaning , about jobs , about years of university that give them nothing , about the price of stuffs , about bad boy/girlfriends bla bla bla , so i thought that's time to move my ass !

Since i return London i started to learn French . My father lives actualy in France, and i think it could be an adventure to try to live there for some times . I need to take risks to feel alive , i need pressure , i need a push , to fall and get up , to take punches in the face, cuz pretty world is not for me , i was tired of beeing a machine . Since ever i am a warrior and i'm tired of all these easy ! RAMBOOOOOO style !

I start back to take care of my body , running at night makes me feel so good (even if i return with ice on my lashes) the big , no , huge step is quite smoke arg gonna do it slow, veeery slow !

I'll not forgive myself easly for the behavior i have for few months .
I played the bored , selflessly , i play the bitch queen , the superior . . .
I'm not better then anyone , even if i contantly need to prove that no one is better then me too. . .

New born , from now on i'll take it easy , i'll have more time for everything and everyone .

I leave you with a song that i love :


Lyris here:

Love

Discordia

P.S Don't forget to check on my set in Member review Bad Romance