dirty__1

Week one of school down. 4 1/2 left...This first week was actually kinda easy..I was suprised. That's a good sign I suppose, but then again this class is only over the Micrsoft Office suit..Yeah hard stuff I know. The next class I'll have is a speech class..Which means I gotta buy a damn web cam so that's gonna be REAL interesting.

So lastnite I had to go out to the school & watch Breeann do her little cheerleading & dance thing. Yeah it lasted about 3 MAYBE 4 minutes. Plus she was out in center court with a bunch of other kids all over the court, k-12, so I couldn't hardly even see her. So I got one or two pictures & that's it. Plus when we got out there come to find out..it was HOMECOMING! Yeah I was really thrilled about that. Of corse Bree wanted to stay for the second game & Homecoming greeeaaat!!

Then after the damn game my ex comes over & starts talking. We end up sitting there for damn near an hour! She just kept bringin up stuff from back when we were dating & how bored she gets at home.. I just don't think things are quite as happy at her house as they want everyone to believe...

It sux because for the last few MONTHS I been having dreams about Amanda. Every dream is me & her getting back together. In some ways I'd love it, in other ways I really don't think I could ever get over all the bullshit she's put me through..It's messed up. I just have so many mixed emotions when it comes to her. Maybe it's just because of Breeann..I dunno..

Gabrielle's gonna be outta here this week sometime so I'll seriously be alone again..

It's good in some ways. From the day I got home I've depended on her in one way or another...The last month or so I've actually started to try & do more & more stuff on my own. So I'm just putting this all behind me & looking ahead. If I sit & dwell on it it's just going to drag me down. I've been through a hell of alot worse & I've come out just fine.

This too shall pass