diello

Why do i end up posting heavy emotional shit on here more than anything else?

anyway...

What is it about life?

In the last ten months I have had some of the highest highs and lowest lows:

worked where I made the most responsibility and money ever for me
had an affair with a friend of 15 years
alienated most of my coworkers while still getting praise from management
started dating my assistant
got into fights with my assistant at work while she tried to save the relationship outside of work
got buried at the job because they expanded beyond my abilities
voluntarily resigned
broke up with my former assistant
fell into hedonism that magnified a lingering depression causing me to be legitimately suicidal for the first time in my life
got a new job with even more potential than the last one
may have just brokered a huge business deal

My head is spinning.

I have no regrets but I feel like I'm fighting a war in my own head. I was attacked from so many angles at the last job I'm having trouble regrouping with a solid self image. I've always thought of myself as someone that can learn from things and move on pretty easily, but I can't this time.

I hope this new job keep distracting me enough to move on. I feel like I've been coming back down to earth more recently.

eh - that's enough for now.