So the bright and shiny entries have ended....
I spent all day in bed crying. My back was fucking killing me. So much I decided to go to the ER. They can't ever help me but I hoped that maybe this time would be different. The Doctor actually listened to me. He suggested that I have a MRI. How the hell can I afford to pay for that with no insurance I don't freaking know. I did get a prescription for a low dose anti depressant. Apparantly in low doses it used to treat chronic pain. Who knew? I got some scrips for Vicadon (woot) and some more Tramadol and some anti inflamatories. Now all I can do is be able to afford it. I hate this. I feel so unnatractive, so unworthy as a person, and I feel like a total loser. I have no life. I can't do anything. I feel good for like a day or two and then wham. This is the worst that my back problems have been in years. Which is why the MRI was suggested. Something has changed. We just need to figure out what.
Umm what else... I was all confused by men but I have decided to say FUCK IT. Whatever happens or doesn't happens does not change who I am. I will be open to change. I can't keep being scared. Funny how excruciating pain puts things into perspective for you.
That is all the whinning I can accomplish right now. Leave me some love. I need it. You guys make me
I spent all day in bed crying. My back was fucking killing me. So much I decided to go to the ER. They can't ever help me but I hoped that maybe this time would be different. The Doctor actually listened to me. He suggested that I have a MRI. How the hell can I afford to pay for that with no insurance I don't freaking know. I did get a prescription for a low dose anti depressant. Apparantly in low doses it used to treat chronic pain. Who knew? I got some scrips for Vicadon (woot) and some more Tramadol and some anti inflamatories. Now all I can do is be able to afford it. I hate this. I feel so unnatractive, so unworthy as a person, and I feel like a total loser. I have no life. I can't do anything. I feel good for like a day or two and then wham. This is the worst that my back problems have been in years. Which is why the MRI was suggested. Something has changed. We just need to figure out what.
Umm what else... I was all confused by men but I have decided to say FUCK IT. Whatever happens or doesn't happens does not change who I am. I will be open to change. I can't keep being scared. Funny how excruciating pain puts things into perspective for you.
That is all the whinning I can accomplish right now. Leave me some love. I need it. You guys make me

VIEW 26 of 26 COMMENTS
If fucking sucks that you are in pain doll but i know that you are dealing with it alot better than you thought you could. You could sit here on this site and draw sympathetic energies from the posts that you read or you can realize that life is most of the time pretty fucked for all of us.
The Philadelphia Eagles lost, how do you think I feel? Is there a comparison to your physical pain...........nope..........Do I have a point?.............Nope, I did about thirty fucking seconds ago, but I forget it, I'm just screwing with you, I guess, I don't remember is i was or not. Don't be a vamp doll, You can choose your areas of strength rather than create a shopping list of lifes let downs to you........Fuck it, I'm blitzed, I'll catch you L8er doll.............Aj