deviance191x

okay, i believe that it's time to actually plow you're mind over with something other than, uhm . . . what? i'm bored.

okay, that doesn't actually mean that anything i say can vanquish the evil that i've done the past couple weeks.

or the hate the i feel for myself.

i'm not what you would call perfect, or even close to any conception that could relinquish this factor.

i have a new found . . . what's the best word . . . discomfort? with myself. i am not exactly sure how i want to go about pronouncing this.

basically i suppose i've reached a state of depression.

i don't leave my room aside from going to class and although i DO know why i'm not exactly sure why i care at this exact point in time.

everything just seems so out of control...

I do know, that if anything is even close to a devil or an antichrist, it's alcohol. you do things you don't even remember and then can't forgive yourself for the discomforts that you have caused.

i'm going to go, i dunno back to sleep or something.

hope you all are doing much better.

-->deviance