deviance191x

i hate it when people tell you not to worry and then go about telling you all the reasons you should worry. it's like okay i surrender to nothingness.

i'm not okay with my friends being suicidal or having problems that they won't let me help them with. honestly what is friendship if you can't care about someone you love?

last time i checked friendship was being there when someone needed you. helping people out when they're having difficulties. just you know being there.

last time i also checked friendship wasn't running around empty and mindless trying not to care about something that a true friend should care about. i'm not here for the mercy of empty sorrow and unwanted caring.

it's understandable that people don't want pity. but why is that all that i have to offer when it's just genuine worry and care.

i have a lot of self-doubt and it hurts and almost spoils who i am if i can't worry about the people that suffer the very pains that i'm going through. i'm sorry that i have feelings and i'm sorry that it hurts that they don't want me to be the very person i am supposed to be to them.

if they didn't want my friendship and they didn't want my worry then why confide their problems in me? is it really worth the energy or the time it took to lament and savor in selt-pity if you don't want that very person that you confided in to lament and feel for you along side you.

there are a few things that i ask you to keep in mind when placing someone in these very circumstances:

- keep in mind that there are always people that care and worry
- remember that the above meantioned is exactly why those people are a part of your life to care and worry, what's a friend but someone that you can reason with and confide in?
- don't ask them to condone you regardless of your situation, after all friends have things in common and quite often they understand and know what you're going through
- friends feel pain too and it hurts to be told not only to not care, but that we have no right doing so
- caring is not pity, it can be but it's usually exactly what it's said to be
- because we care we are not bad people, i'm fucking sorry that i have feelings
- most importantly, don't tell your life story if you don't want anyone to listen, i am not your puppet and a true friend would understand that.
- care for me as i care for you, as you should expect me to do the same.
- you are no one's burden unless they say so, and then there is no reason for friendship
- justify in your heart of hearts that i care, you'd do the same for me . . . if you were really my friend.

sadly forgotten,
deviance