Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

deusexmachina

Rio Fucking Dell, Nor Cal

Member Since 2004

Followers 51 Following 64

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Tuesday May 20, 2008

May 20, 2008
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
Life the last couple of days has been simultaneously awesome and utter crap. It seems as though a lot of stuff around me (read: my friends) are coming undone at the seams, and it has started to wear on me over the last 48hrs pretty heavy. What is so annoying about the whole thing is that I realized today that it is kinda distracting me from all of the super positive stuff that has been going on in my life, so here is a list to remind myself:

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

1) I am single. This is usually a negative in my book, but right now, watching some bullshit go down with friends, I am really, really happy to be single. I don't want to be in any sort of relationship until I am mature enough to handle it and not hurt the person I am with. I am not so sure that I am at that place yet, so being single allows me the time to work on my personal shit NOW so I can be fully engaged when the right person comes along.

2) I (finally) straightened out some (more) lame bureaucratic nonsense at my law school, and managed to not put a fist through anyone's condescending face in the process.

3) I genuinely cannot wait for summer school to start in a week. This may seem odd, but academics have always been my best coping mechanism (avoidance?) when it comes to personal drama.

4) I have actually had a pretty amazing weekend with a "friend" of mine up in Humboldt. And while nothing romantic happened between us, she finally has seen a side of me that not a lot of people get to see. Where I grew up, and how that has shaped me. And she was totally into it. It has taken me almost 7 years to get her up there. Also, she and my mom got to bond, which is a really nice thing for me, because I think there has always been a bit of tension between the two of them. Some sort of weird territorial thing over me. Neither one really getting what my relationship to each of them is about. I think they both finally "got it" this weekend. This is all very subtle, but I realize it will have some huuuuge longterm repercussions.

5) I think, in being a little overwhelmed/disappointed by some of my friends' behavior over the past couple of days, I have been reminded of why I need to branch out a bit, and make some new ones, or at least not get into the habit of putting the ones I have on a pedestal. Not fair to them or myself in the long run.



OK. So all that was a bit emo...but doesn't even scrape the top of the iceberg at this point. Totally ripping off the great Flux now:


Fuck War! I'm going dancing.



VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
truthwhore:
I disagree. I think experience is the purpose of life.
May 22, 2008
truthwhore:
I'm not wrong.
May 23, 2008

More Blogs

  • 09.13.06
    1

    Wednesday Sep 13, 2006

    23 hrs until my best friend arrives into town 24 hrs until I get …
  • 09.07.06
    9

    Thursday Sep 07, 2006

    Apparently my last post invoked the wrath, or at least mild irritatio…
  • 09.06.06
    4

    Wednesday Sep 06, 2006

    I am on a roll these days...Now let's just see how long I can make it…
  • 08.28.06
    5

    Monday Aug 28, 2006

    Yeah, I got my Wifi to work in the GGU Library...there goes my law sc…
  • 08.16.06
    2

    Wednesday Aug 16, 2006

    Fuck It... 7.5 hrs of studying is enough for one day. Not to mention …
  • 08.14.06
    3

    Monday Aug 14, 2006

    Torts are booooooooring....I my Civ Pro reading in the morning is som…
  • 08.12.06
    6

    Saturday Aug 12, 2006

    Well, I survived my week of pointless orientation. Although I managed…
  • 08.06.06
    3

    Sunday Aug 06, 2006

    I will be staying in SF all this week for orientation (sund-thurs nig…
  • 07.31.06
    7

    Monday Jul 31, 2006

    It has been a while since I have updated here with anything resemblin…
  • 07.22.06
    3

    Saturday Jul 22, 2006

    last night once again proved that PnP roleplaying and alcohol do onot…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
8
months
10
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,589 SuicideGirls
  • 1,126,177 followers
  • 14,903,097 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,346,411 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo