destro

it's amazing, after being such a wreck, that some little thing can make me smile so much, like the scent of someone still on the pillow as you sleep, hours after they leave... or finding a stray hair on your sweatshirt that reminds you where you were the night before.

things that were once lost are now coming back to me. the feeling of confidence. the feeling of worth. loving myself for who i am. remembering what it's like to care about someone. the butterflys and tingles from a glance of green eyes.

....and my love, my puppy, rocky, who ran off over a year ago. this morning, as i stepped out of the house int the sunlight and crispness of the morning air, lighting a cigarette, i look off of the back porch at the bright blue sky, realize how beautifull the days are getting..... and see him walking acrossed the back yard. he waled with his head down, like he used to when he knew he did something wrong. walked up to me on the porch, and rolled over at my feet. he wore a new collar, with tags of someone elses address on them now. i called and left the woman a message that the dog was at my house. his real home.

if you love something, and it leaves. just wait. it will come back to you in time, if it loves you to.

my love came back today. a new one is started.

i like the way my days are going..... just like they were meant to .

everything happens for a reason, even if you can;t see that reason now.