Given the opportunity and considering how much of a diary I have used this place as in the past...
Well it was a funny coincidence that I received an email from a 'Missy Suicide' for another brief moment on this website during the same period I just ended a 5+ year relationship.
Lets forgo the eloquence and say the last time I was spending any great amount of time on here I felt my heart as being huge, cavernous, and mostly frozen. I'd remark on specific points of geographic interest, a place where such person had left a chamber sulfuric and poisoned. There was a cave-in once. Someone used a controlled blast to excavate it once.
Etcetera.
Now although I've lost a lot of romanticism/introspection for the sake of future internet-archaeologists I'll say my heart now feels minuscule. Shriveled, room-temperature and about the size... well of a real heart. As far as poetic metaphors go, I feel this once expansive, unexplored territory has become a withered fruit.
I should dig a hole in this already cold ground, bury it and wait for a spring that may never happen.
How did my heart shrink so much? I don't know, I was letting someone else hold on to it and I wasn't really paying attention.
The End.
