Hello!
as you probably know, @missy and @rambo are doing weekly blog topics! Although I'm still a hopeful I decided to join in on them, this one isn't quite a simple answer, but I'll try my best and you will probably know me way better afterwards haha! I guess I first heard about suicide girls way back when it was new, I remember seeing something about it on that HBO series Real Sex and I thought to myself "wow I wish I could do that" I remember hearing Missy talk about punk rock pinup and seeing all the girls having a great time at a slumber party or something awesome like that! At the time I was struggling with who I was and wasn't comfortable with myself and involved in a relationship that would change everything about who I would become (and wouldn't become.. Quite yet anyways) in high school I was always a little on the outside, I was the girl who dressed like a "hippy" one day and came to school in a fake leather mini skirt the next day, I was friends with all the groups then you were either normal or a freak... Hahaha you can guess where I fit. I had friends while at school but only one "out of school" friend and I think I was quite ok with that. At 19 I met the guy I would marry at 23 and sometime inbetween is when I saw that HBO special and "OMG did you hear about that girl we all know moved away and became a suicide girl" happened and I was secretly jealous that she could do something I could not. Looking back now on the 12 years we were together after the now 6 years of clearing my head out I have realized that someone who makes you feel like you're not good enough or smart enough or cool enough to do anything (or even mention it for fear of the reaction) makes you empty, hollow and a shell of a person. So, after all that I shall get to the point! In early 2008 (when the relationship ended) I began my metamorphosis I suppose. I began some modeling (non nude) just to make myself feel like I was real and pretty and after a few years of that I gradually ended up in the semi nude area. As I became myself again and fully I saw a photo of @radeo on IG and began to follow her and suicide girls. She was stunning, cool, nerdy and it made me want to be like her! And it brought me here. So I guess I have Miss Radeo to thank for changing my life. I have friends here who are like me and inspire me on the daily to do ME, to not apologize for or explain myself. To love myself and want to be a part of this crazy beautiful fucked up place.
Later lil fishes
Deliriumm
IG: delighttodelirium
@radeo thank you so much
