delilah_banks

People swarmed around me with their stories about drinking and their need for sex. Against the wall, I watched the movement of my jeans as the floor gently shook against their weight.

Behind the square window, my professor powdered her nose, waiting for her chance to explain Chinese women. "They couldn't have makeup on the ships. They were Feminists." I admired Cheleen.

A group of girls merged infront of me. The boys followed. Between the treads of the wallpaper, I hid. "I need drama," I mumbled. "I need tragedy." The girls turned around. "Everything is so mundane." The one with the blonde ponytail laughed, "be careful what you wish for."

********

The yellow paint was starting to chip, and Sofie's grapes were where we left them that morning. "The goddess!" Sofie ran to me and hugged my legs. "My little monkey-toe!" I loved Sofie and her Chinese features; I found my childhood in her words and hair.

"Aimee, do you want to go to China to teach English?" Kathleen propped Sofie on her knee. "I think you'd be perfect of for the job. Just think of the adventures." Sofie found the nickels I hid from her earlier. I watched her place each one in her mother's floppy drive. "When do I leave?"

*******

The rivers were flowing two inches above normal in June. Miles of cars stretched the banks: half for the fish, half for the float. The Mission Mountains scraped the sky, dwarfing the the mouth of the Flathead.

I dipped my toes into the water, hoping the current would pick up and swallow me. I knew something would happen; that I wouldn't return. If I ended it now, I wouldn't have to suffer in the unknown.

Under the glacial runoff, I watched the clouds run. My head, filled with smoke, bounced with the tide. The air slipped from my lungs and through the water, taking my decision with it.