January 1 2009 is here .... oh boy.
I'm going to do my very best to post something on here on a day to day basis, almost like a journal. I don't have much to hide, if anything, so I figure, 'fuck it', I may as well post something on here. If you've taken the time to read this, thank you.
Let's start with how 2009 came in .... without a bang.
My current girlfriend,
is in Idaho with her family for the holidays. She called/texted last night to with me a Happy New Year but I couldn't do anything because I was working. When the clock struck 12 here, truckloads of people around me had their midnight kiss. It's been a while since I haven't had a midnight kiss so I was looking forward to this year.
Knowing Amy (girlfriend) is away, this is going to be all but impossible. I could always step out the box and find someone to kiss, but in turn, that means I'm cheating on my relationship. Having been there, being both the cheater and the cheated, that's a shitty feeling.
Side note - if you ask me, you're cheating YOURSELF in the relationship you're in ... not on the person whom you're in the relationship with. Cheating ON that person with someone else, sucks, however, you're only cheating yourself - in my opinion.
The clock strikes midnight and I send her a text, while others are kissing each other and celebrating, saying "Happy New Year. I really miss you." She calls, I miss the call because where I am it's super loud and didn't feel my phone vibrate so I called her back a few minutes later.
She was quite bubbly on the phone and could tell that something was wrong. I'm not going to lie to her, because that's shitty too, so I told her I wasn't stoked. She was asking what happened, what was wrong, and without being her wet blanket, I said "I'll tell you later."
She sent me a text 20 minutes later asking me to call her when I had a minute. I didn't text her, even though I should have called, until after I got home. I wrote her and said, "My heart hurts, I'll explain later", thinking I'd hear from her within a few minutes of sending that message.
No soap.
She sends me a bright text this morning asking what was wrong. I didn't respond then while checking e-mail on Facebook (add me if you're bored) when she pops in on the IM and says, "hello?" I asked if she could talk, and she said yes.
I called her, we spoke for a while, and despite my reluctance to tell her what was on my mind, I did. She starts asking me what can be done and I told her, "nothing. I know You're there with family and nothing can happen but please let me know that you miss things, ANYTHING." As the conversation wasn't going well, she tells me that I'm "being a prick" about things. I said, "you're right. I'm probably over-reacting."
Then she says, "I'm sorry to hurt your feelings by not telling you .." as I interrupt her and said, "not telling me doesn't hurt my feelings as much as you calling me a PRICK!"
At this point, I said, "I think I'm gonna go." She says, "well, Happy New Year."
"Yeah ... happy new year" I respond.
We hang up and that's that.
If you've made it this far and think I'm a complete pussy for not standing up for myself, you're gravely mistaken. Take some time to get to know me and you'll find someone who doesn't take a whole lot before he pulls the plug on what's going on.
This is shaping up to be one of those instances. She's done this before and I've checked her on it....however, this time, it's a tad different ... seeing that she's in another time zone. I could EASILY pull the plug, and get back on track with my life, but what will that accomplish? I don't just give up without trying. She's a really cool chick who has a sharp tongue. I'm not a fan of being treated like shit, likewise, I wouldn't want to be in her shoes.
What to do?
I'm going to chill for a few, let things settle, then see what happens when she returns on Saturday. When we talk on the phone, while she's at home, our conversation is limited and feels like we're just 'going through the motion' of having a chat. If she still stands by this attitude she has when we're face to face, I'm out. I don't have time for that kind of shit and I wouldn't expect her to stick around.
Now, I'm laying in bed, thinking about the day, the rest of the year, and what's to come. I'm not one to settle for second best, so here's to 2009. It has to be better than how it started.
Feel free to check in on these and comment at will. as I mentioned earlier, I've nothing to hide.
We're in a new year, time for new things.
Thanks for being a part of this page.
Cheers
Chris in Reno
I'm going to do my very best to post something on here on a day to day basis, almost like a journal. I don't have much to hide, if anything, so I figure, 'fuck it', I may as well post something on here. If you've taken the time to read this, thank you.
Let's start with how 2009 came in .... without a bang.
My current girlfriend,
is in Idaho with her family for the holidays. She called/texted last night to with me a Happy New Year but I couldn't do anything because I was working. When the clock struck 12 here, truckloads of people around me had their midnight kiss. It's been a while since I haven't had a midnight kiss so I was looking forward to this year.
Knowing Amy (girlfriend) is away, this is going to be all but impossible. I could always step out the box and find someone to kiss, but in turn, that means I'm cheating on my relationship. Having been there, being both the cheater and the cheated, that's a shitty feeling.
Side note - if you ask me, you're cheating YOURSELF in the relationship you're in ... not on the person whom you're in the relationship with. Cheating ON that person with someone else, sucks, however, you're only cheating yourself - in my opinion.
The clock strikes midnight and I send her a text, while others are kissing each other and celebrating, saying "Happy New Year. I really miss you." She calls, I miss the call because where I am it's super loud and didn't feel my phone vibrate so I called her back a few minutes later.
She was quite bubbly on the phone and could tell that something was wrong. I'm not going to lie to her, because that's shitty too, so I told her I wasn't stoked. She was asking what happened, what was wrong, and without being her wet blanket, I said "I'll tell you later."
She sent me a text 20 minutes later asking me to call her when I had a minute. I didn't text her, even though I should have called, until after I got home. I wrote her and said, "My heart hurts, I'll explain later", thinking I'd hear from her within a few minutes of sending that message.
No soap.
She sends me a bright text this morning asking what was wrong. I didn't respond then while checking e-mail on Facebook (add me if you're bored) when she pops in on the IM and says, "hello?" I asked if she could talk, and she said yes.
I called her, we spoke for a while, and despite my reluctance to tell her what was on my mind, I did. She starts asking me what can be done and I told her, "nothing. I know You're there with family and nothing can happen but please let me know that you miss things, ANYTHING." As the conversation wasn't going well, she tells me that I'm "being a prick" about things. I said, "you're right. I'm probably over-reacting."
Then she says, "I'm sorry to hurt your feelings by not telling you .." as I interrupt her and said, "not telling me doesn't hurt my feelings as much as you calling me a PRICK!"
At this point, I said, "I think I'm gonna go." She says, "well, Happy New Year."
"Yeah ... happy new year" I respond.
We hang up and that's that.
If you've made it this far and think I'm a complete pussy for not standing up for myself, you're gravely mistaken. Take some time to get to know me and you'll find someone who doesn't take a whole lot before he pulls the plug on what's going on.
This is shaping up to be one of those instances. She's done this before and I've checked her on it....however, this time, it's a tad different ... seeing that she's in another time zone. I could EASILY pull the plug, and get back on track with my life, but what will that accomplish? I don't just give up without trying. She's a really cool chick who has a sharp tongue. I'm not a fan of being treated like shit, likewise, I wouldn't want to be in her shoes.
What to do?
I'm going to chill for a few, let things settle, then see what happens when she returns on Saturday. When we talk on the phone, while she's at home, our conversation is limited and feels like we're just 'going through the motion' of having a chat. If she still stands by this attitude she has when we're face to face, I'm out. I don't have time for that kind of shit and I wouldn't expect her to stick around.
Now, I'm laying in bed, thinking about the day, the rest of the year, and what's to come. I'm not one to settle for second best, so here's to 2009. It has to be better than how it started.
Feel free to check in on these and comment at will. as I mentioned earlier, I've nothing to hide.
We're in a new year, time for new things.
Thanks for being a part of this page.
Cheers
Chris in Reno