decayingyouth

Today I realized that Im a complete and total loser. Now if your wonder how I can to that point its easy; every time that I heard a phone ring, especially my cell phone, I was hoping it was my ex-girlfriend or at lease a friend. The only time the phone was for me was when the army was trying o recruit me. That was actually an interesting phone call. The Army called wanting ME to join. I already have medial discharge from the Army and their calling me to join. I was kind of hoping that the Army would keep record of whos been in the army already, but hey what do I know. I thing that really is starting to bug me lately is sound. Everything about me seems either to loud and chaotic or so silence I can hear my heart still breaking. So far my therapy for this break up has been watching movies till I go numb. Ive tried to good home work like a good boy should do but I cant focus on this mindless crap that the school thinks I should know. The only class really hoping my interest is physics and I dont get much work in that class. Sometimes I wonder if people would notice if was gone. The last few days I just feel like Im taking up valuable space. On a brighter side, I have plans for tomorrow, Im going to school then Im waiting for a phone call, then Im going to watch more movies. Now that I think of it my Ex-girlfriend my call me tomorrow, before the whole ripping my heart out of my chest thing(breaking up with my; Im being melodramatic) I was planning to stay at her place while my car gets fixed; I kind of hope that its still ok to stay in her place for a bit. Well I should try to sleep. Im starting to wonder if theres a point to sleeping if youre sleeping alone. My body just doesnt seem to like sleep lately. I feel tired at 6pm but when 10pm rolls around Im wake. Maybe the sandman hasnt got my change of address card; I should look it to that. I hope that everyone elses lifes is going better then mine.