a day with no music.

3

a day you hear no form of music coming from me, you know there's something wrong.

that was yesterday. had a typical weekend besides i had a friends surprise 30th birthday party to goto, which was fun and it was good to see some old friends that dont hang out as much as we used to. Monday morning email check was the disappointment.. another few denial job confirmations.. "thanks for your interests but we've decide to proceed with other qualified candidates".. seriously losing hope and i dont know what to do. stressing hardcore. i've even gained the thought of maybe trying to get my old job back as much as i despise them but using the bastards to goto school.

i am in a funk, with everything and i hate it. i havent felt literally "good" in a long time.

today. the music is on. i must of slept somewhat, hah, though i am about to force a workout and vocal session because those are the only 2 things in life that clear my head and feel happy about.

i have 3 shows in the next few months that i cant wait for, Sleep(august), Uncle Acid & The Deadbeats(september) and then Danzig performing Samhain right before Halloween. psyched about all these shows and definitely needed in my life. hoping to work a couple more days(side job) so i can purchase SG Blackheart tix this year, last year was awesome!

well time to get sweatin, hope all is well in your world, excuse my downer self.

some Type O Negative for today: (lets see if it embeds, i doubt it lol, always have trouble with it)

VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
death_groove:
@baalseraph i understand we all need jobs to live and pursue our desires. i think some of my friends are contempt with where they're at and that's cool but i am not. and sometimes i just think they don't understand how hard it is to find a job, especially in the US right now,  because they're contempt or have had someone get them into a job, where i don't have that. that's why i usually keep things to myself and do everything myself. there are goals/dreams i don't want to give up on. anxiety doesn't help either. my family just wants the best for me, of course, just sometimes when i do express something, it just gets shot down and bring it back to "reality". for instance, ive been thinking of giving college a shot because it wasn't in my mind after high school, now i could kick myself! but i'm always told what i want to go for is not in the economies interest. which i understand to go do something where you can make money. i just don't want to give in and do something and be miserable. and i'm not getting any younger haha! i think once i do find a job i will definitely give school a chance, though i think i could get financial aid even now.
baalseraph:
I totally understand your situation. I'm actually in a quite similar situation myself, for my job somewhat sucks and is a way to earn my living in the first place, but sure as hell it's not what I want to do for the rest of my life. I'm thinking of giving college a shot too, just to get a better qualification for a better job. It's possible to do it in my free time after work, but it will be very hard and quite costly...we'll see. I'm sorry that your people are not getting behind you. You should always have someone who encourages you to pursue your dreams, no matter what they are or if they are "in the economies interest". And you should NEVER do something that makes you feel miserable just because people tell you that it's the right thing to do. NEVER!

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