well, all right. time to update and write something coherant, which i'm not sure i can do on two hours of sleep and probably still drunk, at least a little (my body is not wanting to keep itself upright. since voluntary muscles are responsible i have no one to blame but myself.)
yesterday, after working and cleaning my room... i went downtown to the paper heart (750 grand ave, just north of the intersection of van buren and 7th ave) because a guy i know, december, was playing there with his band, element a440. after parading around at work in my little black dress i set off, and got there about 9:30. december said he'd be playing at 11 or so. i was scared shitless. despite all the progress i've made i'm still afraid of being by myself in a large group of people i don't know. i sat in my car for a few minutes wondering what the hell i should do, and then was attacked by a bout of stomach upset and decided to walk to church's chicken so that i could empty my bowels. (for whatever reason i didn't want to shit in the paper heart. maybe it's that old adage, 'you don't shit where you eat'. i didn't want people referring to me after as 'that girl who stunk up the bathroom'.)
so i get there and the bathroom reads 'for customers only'. well, being my nonconfrontational and not cheap self, instead of a.) ordering a small soda and demanding use of the bathroom or b.) walking across the street to mcdonald's and using their bathroom for free, i ordered some chikin and a biskit deal that cost $2.91 and, after receiving it, begged the cashier to open the bathroom where i proceeded to insult the toilet highly. after i left i put the chicken and biscuit in a prominent place near the restaurant so that anyone who wanted it could find it, and thought to myself that that was the most expensive shit i've ever taken- or left, as it happens.
after that i went back to the paper heart and actually went in. the thing with my fear is, like everything, if i let it hang around for long enough i'll get bored with it and plunge right into whatever i'm afraid of. a beer took the edge off my nerves. skumlove was playing as well and did a superb job. my friend adam, who i had been texting earlier, showed up and associated with me. he was better looking than i remembered, but it *was* dark. in any sense i got a couple of drinks out of him, bought element's CD, commented on people's shirts. afterward, december invited me to my very first afterparty. i stopped at AM-PM to buy a $3.50 bottle of wine and like i said, we killed that pretty easily.
element... what can i say about them. this is the first time i've seen live music, basically. and it fucking rocked. i fell in and out of love every twenty seconds with all the men around me. december plays the drums and does an amazing job. i'm immensely attracted to him, although the fact that he only weighs about 120 pounds dripping wet is mildly disconcerting.
good thing i don't have self-image issues. ha ha.
i wonder when i'll get to go to sleep. i might just have to give up the night. but i have monday off.
fuck YEAH!
yesterday, after working and cleaning my room... i went downtown to the paper heart (750 grand ave, just north of the intersection of van buren and 7th ave) because a guy i know, december, was playing there with his band, element a440. after parading around at work in my little black dress i set off, and got there about 9:30. december said he'd be playing at 11 or so. i was scared shitless. despite all the progress i've made i'm still afraid of being by myself in a large group of people i don't know. i sat in my car for a few minutes wondering what the hell i should do, and then was attacked by a bout of stomach upset and decided to walk to church's chicken so that i could empty my bowels. (for whatever reason i didn't want to shit in the paper heart. maybe it's that old adage, 'you don't shit where you eat'. i didn't want people referring to me after as 'that girl who stunk up the bathroom'.)
so i get there and the bathroom reads 'for customers only'. well, being my nonconfrontational and not cheap self, instead of a.) ordering a small soda and demanding use of the bathroom or b.) walking across the street to mcdonald's and using their bathroom for free, i ordered some chikin and a biskit deal that cost $2.91 and, after receiving it, begged the cashier to open the bathroom where i proceeded to insult the toilet highly. after i left i put the chicken and biscuit in a prominent place near the restaurant so that anyone who wanted it could find it, and thought to myself that that was the most expensive shit i've ever taken- or left, as it happens.
after that i went back to the paper heart and actually went in. the thing with my fear is, like everything, if i let it hang around for long enough i'll get bored with it and plunge right into whatever i'm afraid of. a beer took the edge off my nerves. skumlove was playing as well and did a superb job. my friend adam, who i had been texting earlier, showed up and associated with me. he was better looking than i remembered, but it *was* dark. in any sense i got a couple of drinks out of him, bought element's CD, commented on people's shirts. afterward, december invited me to my very first afterparty. i stopped at AM-PM to buy a $3.50 bottle of wine and like i said, we killed that pretty easily.
element... what can i say about them. this is the first time i've seen live music, basically. and it fucking rocked. i fell in and out of love every twenty seconds with all the men around me. december plays the drums and does an amazing job. i'm immensely attracted to him, although the fact that he only weighs about 120 pounds dripping wet is mildly disconcerting.
good thing i don't have self-image issues. ha ha.
i wonder when i'll get to go to sleep. i might just have to give up the night. but i have monday off.
fuck YEAH!