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So for some good news I heard back form my freind and model who had the lyme disease, i dunno if shes doing better but after 3 weeks of silence im glad to knwo shes alive, still seeing doctors every day but alive. I'm sad that this is happening to ehr though csaue shes already been haveing problems with her thyroid gland for the past year and she also needed suregery on her hand i knwo she was workign 3 jobs and goign to school at night plus taking care of her kid .. I jsut wish i could help her. I'm going to offer to get her groceries for her next tiem we talk ,,i know its a small gesture but i dunno how else to help.

My heart still hurtsts from otehr thigns that are happenign with other people and well now i havent even been able to get a hard on for the past 3 days either. So thigns kindof suck here. I'm hoping when i go out to Honfest this weekend that maybe i'll make some new freinds or when i go to the club this sunday tht i'll find someoen to talk to to take my mind off things. Howeer msot of my other freinds are out of town or out of country till the end of this month so yarg. No one to talk to in person ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

you ever get the feeling people are lieing to you. I'm not paranoid or anything. I just noticed that well 3 people ive known for over a year now dont answer ehte phoen anymroe but they tell me to call tehm all the time then they say they dont have time to hang out with friends yet they write about allthese crazy adventures they had with friends. So im feeling a bit left out. Its no one from here i can assure you of that but yknow if they are keeping me a friend out of pity then thats gonna piss me off.

T