davidjett

Snakes On A Redneck!

Well, this was bound to happen. Kinda like another big hurricane hitting this year, or the Dixie Chicks cancelling their tour stop here in Memphis (even though they sold out the Fed Ex Forum last time through, Pre-Bush bashing. As soon as they announced they were cancelling some dates due to slow ticket sales, I knew redneck Memphis would be on that list. They're replacing the cancelled shows with some new ones in Canada, where I hope to be living within the next ten years.)

A convenience store in Arkansas (of course) was robbed by men using...do I even have to type it? Snakes. They came into the store with two baby pythons. The gals working there screamed and ran into the back while the robbers grabbed one girls car keys and made off in the car she had just bought two days before. Yes, that's right. Someone idiot redneck was inspired by Snakes On A Plane, and used snakes to rob a store. And it worked. In Arkansas. Honestly, if some guy walked into my place of business and said, "this is a robbery! we've got snakes!" I would laugh my ass off! Seriously, is he gonna throw a snake at my head? Now if someone put a snake in my bed or car, I would totally lose it and run around screaming like a bitch. However, if I'm in a fairly public, open space, I could just...oh...step out of the way. And the only snakes I'm really scared of are the poisonous ones. And no redneck thief from Arkansas is running around carrying Copperheads. Now if a pair of actual experienced snake handlers came in, well, that's a different story.