Chicken Tenders

Chicken tenders are always good. It's hard to fuck up something like a tender. When you live that close to a breast, it's hard to let people down. Of course, beer batter is where it's at. It's been a while since I've beer battered anything... hide your dildos ladies.

In other news, Saturday rocked - literally. It's been over two years since I've played out and it was like a moist pussy fart wrapped in a cotton candy daydream. And there was beer... and chicken tenderness. Al Green's favorite bar snack.

When life gives you lemons

Did you know that my sperm isn't a condiment?


Tell it Hugo!

I heart long weekends

Best thing about long weekends is having a car. Bc you can go fucking anywhere and leave your phone in the gun drawer next to the laundry detergent. That way, you and your counterpart can hang out without the possibility of armed voilence.

Shameless Self-Promotion

Oh, check it out, MY BAND'S PLAYING ON MONDAY THE 18TH AT THE SIDEBAR W/ THE PINK LINCOLNS! I'm gonna wear my favorite strap-on - Clyde.

Gotta get those flyers out! Leave me a comment. This week's topic will be best sex move. Daniel-san had the crane (ripped off from Miyagi). You know the drill. No cliches.