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datura

east side o' town yo

SG Since 2004

Followers 1557 Following 102

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Sunday Jan 09, 2005

Jan 9, 2005
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Ah yes, the brain on exhibition once again. Here we go kids:
You would think, or I would think, that not being dead in that Tsunami, or in war in Irag right now, would make this gripping sense of depression leave my bones , or abate it somewhat. Why does it not work like that? I used to have this amazing ability to be awfully sad, but still grab tiny gems of joy when I could, storing them up in my pocket while waiting for the time when I would fill my whle body with them and shine with light.
So to sum up, despite being lucky enough to be alive, and have wonderful people in my life, I still feel shitty, unmotivated, and pathetically sullen. It is the kind of situation where steps could be taken to feel better, and yet, your feet feel to heavy to even try and step in that direction.
Yes, I know, woe is me. Poor me. This is where the part comes in where my friends say, "Don't be so hard on yourself." Except, if I relax on it, I will never make it out of the rut that has my naked toes coated in murky filth.
Hmm, I guess that is about all for now. I am going to attack my list of things to do, and attempt my homework, which is art projects, which normally I pee my pants in excitement for, but right now, I don't even want to lift my arms. Yes, I realize I have painted a beautiful textual picture of myself here. The brain on exhibit in the cyber gallery makes for an interesting show for strangers to walk by, frown, and then move on. Let's hope that my next entry has me out of this bullshit I mired myself into.
And yeah, there's lots of dead people from the Tsumani, it's fucking atrocious, so if you can spare any funds to help, right on. blackeyed
VIEW 22 of 22 COMMENTS
katie:
Hey, you should join the Los Angeles Area Suicide Girls Group if you haven't already. It's for SG's only, and local events oming up are posted there, and it's also a good way to organize your own events or let us know about things going on as well : ]

http://suicidegirls.com/groups/Los+Angeles+Area+SGs/

xoxo
Jan 23, 2005
dumpstarx:
Oh me oh my oh. The blues are an important part of feeling alive. You're one of my favorites. I joined this site a lil while back and started wandering it with a lizerd on my shoulder. I think he whispered something in my ear about you.
Jan 24, 2005

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