I'm really thankful that in addition to my time spent in the physical world I can have my space here to make sense of it all.
In the last few days I've gotten through the end of a rough week at work, seen the drunkest wedding party I've ever encountered, gotten new perspective on people I'd written off, and also taken time to marvel at the sheer brilliance of life in motion.
First off the boring stuff. Work was crazy as hell but it's gradation time. Since I work at a "family themed" restaurant many families and teens stop out on nights such as those to celebrate and eat. I've heard that food service is the most stressful industry to work for and encountered nothing to dissuade me from the notion. Overall my working life is why I play violent video games. hehehe.
Next is one of the reason's why I love humanity: Occasionally a person I thought was completely one dimensional turns out to be something more. I relate to this because I know what it's like, pretending to be like everyone else when all you really want is people to know who you really are. I'm pretty good at reading people and generally I talk to people who I can't read at first but now I realize that is an idiot's approach. People hide who they are for a multitude of reasons and although many are obviously wearing masks there are also quite a few who are very convincing with their disguises in social situations. They are the people who talk to everyone when all eyes are looking and often take the center spotlight when gregarious behavior is favored yet that social butterfly isn't the person underneath. I've only been taken by this because I wonder if perhaps we aren't all this way to some degree. How much do we compartmentalize our lives to others and why?
Now about the wedding party I went to...
My cousin (dad's brother's son) got married on Saturday and I figured I'd make an appearance. It was a nice change of pace and I got a chance to reconnect with people from my blood line that I actually want to talk to. I found that after all these years many of those people I'd seen at countless Christmas gatherings hadn't changed much at all: much to their detriment or favor. I doubt many of the people in the actual wedding party probably remember that entire day and I honestly expected nothing less from them.
I got to bullshit with my dad's step brother and his son though and that was a large part of the reason I went to that wedding. My dad's step brother is a pretty serious republican supporter but his son is a politician in the state senate for MN. Not just any state senate seat holder either, his son has co drafted a few bills here already that have caused major changes (gay marriage, medical marijuana to name a few) and in the process he's shown that the people in the higher seats of this state are political dinosaurs. I let my cousin know I'm behind him 1000% and also gained new perspective on his political career from his dad. I've always gotten along with this side of my dads family so I suppose it's no surprise I found my peeps rather quickly.
Finally, my appreciation of the world in action.
When I step outside to get high I find myself compelled to look at the lot in between the house I'm in and the neighbors. The guy next door is slacking on his mowing and the grass is pretty damn long but I find a strange sense of peace seeing the long blades sway in the breeze. It's like watching waves across a lake. Seeing that stirs something primal within me. This is the same thing our ancient ancestors saw, nature doing it's thing. I used to think that knowing how something works would ruin the fun of seeing it in motion. Turns out I was really wrong. I feel like I understand the world in a way most never even think twice about and even if I can predict every movement seeing it happen doesn't diminish my sense of wonder one bit. The best part is that despite their greatness other societies have marveled at the same things I'm seeing now and felt humbled by it.
That's all for now. :)