I guess the feeling I've had lately is extreme loneliness. I'm not like most people and it's an easy thing to see. I used to think I was socially awkward but I found relating to people isn't too hard once I overcame that mental burden. Still though I don't feel like I fit into most social groups. People tend to gravitate towards me even but I am oblivious to it most of the time. I think that one of my main problems is that my core beliefs and views don't often jive with most people. I'm agnostic in a sea of Christians and they all look down on me for it as if I'm missing the boat on some hidden truth. I know random facts about almost everything but most times people don't want to hear anything educational (I get met with mocking a lot). While I respect authority I also often question it (a trait that most younger people often like me for). Still though even though people can comprehend these aspects of my personality it seems like none accept them.
I suppose the simplest way to restate this last paragraph would be to say that I feel like if the majority of the people I've encountered on this planet are human, I feel like an alien.
This is why I'm thankful for Suicide Girls. People here feel like kindred spirits to me and I don't have to worry about being called 'weird' or a 'nerd'. I'm pretty sure that one day years from now I'll look back and realize what a huge contribution these blogs are making to my sanity but for now I'm just letting it all out day by day.
If you read this I'd like to say thanks for your time.