darling0

Thursday night I made an absolute ass out of myself. I didn't even think I had had too much to drink, but I still ended up blatantly making out with some random dude and then leaving with him. All of my friends saw -- including my good friend who I knew liked me. and although I didn't feel the same way, and had told him as much, it was still such a shit thing to do right in front of him. and now he hates me. and all his friends hate me. and random people that saw me at the bar are calling me "the makeoutbandit" and I am so effing embarrassed I never want to go out again. I don't even know why I did it. He wasn't even that cute. I've been wracking my brain trying to come up with a reason. Part of me wishes I could say "he must of put something in my drink!" how pathetic is that. and the worst part of it all ? is that all I want to do is drink my embarrassment away, but can't.. unless I want to drink alone. fuck. fuckfudckdf;ljsdfsladjf whyy whyyyy whyyyyyyy did I DO that.