darkenedskyz

well I was going to wait to talk to my dad about moving to san diego til i saw the place, but it's almost august and then i will only have a month til i move, so i guess i will write down what i need to discuss to him about, tell him why i want to move and how i will survive, it's scary at sometimes it's like i don't really want to go , but others it makes me so happy to think about it, i hope my dads ok with the idea and will help me if i need it, but what i really want to know from him is that if it doesn't work out that i will be welcome back. I just wish Paul was here to talk to me about it and comfort me, i could really use his hand to hold right now, and his lips to kiss. I told him that we need to talk he asked about what and i said my future, ..... (sigh) I wish i was stronger, i wish i could just go to him and say Listen dad life sucks here and i am moving to san diego, i am gonna work a little then i will go and finish college when i am settled, Janina is a Nice person and we get along really well, paul is ok even though i will be kinda far, but i will come down and see you and him, and he said he will try to come see me, i know its alot of responsiblity but i think it's time i grew up and tryed the world out on my own. I know he will think its a stupid idea, and escpecially when i tell him i meet my future roomate online, and i havent even met her just typed to her and have a few pics. but i feel i can do it, i will tell him i am getting my permit, and will learn to drive, and i will be looking for a job down there, and and and and and i won't be in your hair anymore or donna's and i don't have to feel like a prison in a house that used to be my home, so i don't have to race a brat for the shower in the morning, so you don't have to worry about a mess in your house anymore........... well i think i will start writing what i need to say to him, lates