darkdesire

Hey what's up everyone? Well just sittin here listening to Death Cab For Cutie and thinkin about life. I was wondering do you ever feel that the one thing you want most you never get. Is it just me or does that thing happen to everyone? See the thing I value most is true love. I go out with girls and get to know them but, with time and getting to know them I know in my heart that she is not for me and I continue searching for her. It's like I want to find the one that I know I was meant to love for life and I'm really starting to believe I will never find her. Sure I have great friends and always seem happy but really on the inside I am dying. I have all this love to give but, can't find the right person to give it to. I made the mistake of thinking I knew what love was and got married but I soon realized I didn't know shit. We ended up splitting, not because of anything we did wrong but because I knew she wasn't the one which killed us in the end. That time in my life did leave a scar but I also grew and realized that I won't just give into second best anymore and to find the someone that I knew in my heart was perfect for me. I just can't find her and every night I pray that I'll meet her the next day and never do. I'm getting tired of putting on this act that I'm perfectly happy when I wish I could let out how I really feel on the inside. I know she's out there somewhere and I hope I find her before it's to late and my heart goes numb...............Hopefully you, my friends understand and can give me advice. Talk to you all later.