How interesting...

Boss goes away on vacation for a week. Boss says I'm now boss during that time. Now granted, this is largely a ceremonial thing, as the boss doesn't do much unless something goes boom and the rest of us can't fix it, or unless some new shiny hardware comes in. That's not what's odd, though.

My personality was a bit different today. I...
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Er. I had thought I'd made another journal more recently, but I suppose not. Alone again. I'm already starting to feel the pressure of finding someone again, and I've already had a couple of times that I've been bored (probably should have gone out, but that's a whole 'nother entry in itself), but I'm free.

Having a g/f tends to make me reclusive and distracts...
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"Don't turn your back on me, don't ever let me down..."

- Flogging Molly, "Within a Mile of Home"

Haven't heard from the lady in a few days. Called her this weekend to get together, she never called back. Figure I'll wait til next week, then write her off. Part of me is wondering if she's not doing the same disappearing act that the last...
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Martial arts as religion.

"This is my church. This is where I heal my hurts."

- Faithless, "God is a DJ"

Not including religion, not a part of a religion -- the art itself is the religion. Instructors as priests, giving support and knowledge. A religion, a community, a group of people dedicated to improving the self by breaking one's own limitations, and strengthening the...
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It's getting to the point that no matter how stagnant or fucked or stupid I feel, I can go to my martial arts class and feel better afterward. I get some exercise, I clear my mind, I do my techniques, and if I fuck them up, there's a lot of people there that will help me out. It's a good feeling. It's relaxing to be...
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In life, it is easy to acquire...habits. Habits become patterns...patterns lead to stagnation...and things get bad.

No, I haven't become a drug addict. I have gotten into a rut , though...(again). However, at least I know I'm in a rut, and I know what I need to do to get out of it. I'm hoping that doing so will rid me of the distant, mildly...
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And now...

More! Random! Babbbbbbbbling!


I've found someone interesting. (Background: "interesting" for me is roughly equivalent to "hot" for most people) She's rather quiet, very sweet, somewhat romantic and very weird. I like being with her. We have a tendency to end up on my couch, with one of us holding the other. I'm more open with her about my thoughts than I have been...
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"You can't kill me..."

27 hours at work over the past two days. Sometimes it sucks when hardware decides to leave this world...

"Get comfortable with being uncomfortable."

The martial arts class I'm taking is kicking my ass...to be expected of course, as I'm hideously out of shape, but still...I'm sore in more places more often than I have been for quite some time. It's annoying, but it's a good pain.

"You don't have to work that hard with me."

She meant it in a different way than...
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I sit up, awake
(hot, salty, sticky blood pulses through me)
I look out, beautiful day!
(My heart beats in my chest, the rhythm of my life defined in the beat)
Today I'm alive.

I'm contented...there will be no sacrificing of virgins to me today.