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dannydmc

Elderon, WI

Member Since 2003

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Monday Mar 24, 2008

Mar 23, 2008
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Happy Birthday too ME!!!!!!!!

Yes, on March 20th at 12:20 am I reached the amamzingly ancient age of 26! There were seriously times in which I wasn't sure if I'd make it this long (during a certain incident in Alaska, I won't repeat for the 10th time, for instance!). But make it, I have and, you know what? It feels pretty damn good.
Oh sure, I've got a few hang ups over it. The fact that I'm now closer to 30 than to 20 is a bit of a shock. So too is the fact that my Dad was married at this age; a bitter realization, considering I haven't been in a relationship for the past 3 and a half years now.
But, by and large? I'm doing good. I was thinking recently, trying to compare myself to where I was at this point last year, and the changes have mostly been for the positive. Back in 2007, in mid-March, I was still stuck in Alaska; the year was coming to an end, but I hadn't yet received an acceptance letter to Grad School. In fact, two of the three schools I'd applied to had turned me down, leaving me in a near panic as I looked forward to yet another year teaching. It seemed as if my entire future was nearing a collapse; as if I'd be stuck teaching for the rest of my life, unless I could find some ingenuis way to sneak out from my bonds.
But I DID get out. I was accepted to school, here in Fargo and, despite some upsets here and there, its been a good move on my part. I'm enjoying school, most of my professors seem to like me (although I suspect they still find me a bit cocky from time to time; a fair assessment). Being still new to town, I haven't managed to gather together the social life I wanted, yet, but I feel confident that it will come in time.

Those of you who have been reading this blog over the past year or so will have noticed a common refrain. Namely, that I missed who I had been, back when I was in college the first time. I was confident, an avowed optimist who was utterly convinced that things would always get better, as long as I put some work into it and strove to improve my lot. Oh, I was cocky as all hell, much of the time, and I had my ideocyncrencies; I enjoyed playing up my country-boy persona for instance (my thought being, at the time, that most college students go to college and do their best to act more cultured than they had before; I wanted to do the opposite. I had terrible luck with women (some things don't seem to change tongue ). But, by and large, I was happy, focused on the future, and enjoying myself.

I don't know exactly how I did it, but I gave myself a great gift this past week; I managed to recapture a small fraction of that old attitude. Oh, not all of it; but if you reread the beginning of this jounral, you'll notice that a certain confidence, which has been heretofore lacking, seems to have found its way back into my writing. What did I even say, two paragraphs ago; I don't have the social life I want, but I'm confident its coming.
Christ, that feels good to say again, after months of being terrified that I was stuck as I was!

Speaking of gifts to myself, I did something else this past week which I think might be related in a roundabout way. You see, on my Birthday four years ago, my car got broken into. I'd come back from hanging out at a friend's place after a small party, drove back to my apartment, and collapsed into bed (it was late, and I had to work the next morning.)
I got up the next morning and drove to Wal-mart where I was working at the time. As I reached back for my smock, I noticed it was covered in small beads of glass. "Hmmmmm", I thought to myself, "this doesn't seem right." (I make no apologize for the slow state of my mind; it was morning, after all, and I was still tired).
I stood there for a few seconds before I looked up and saw one of my backwindows was shattered. "Well", I thought groggily, "that explains why there was that draft in here while driving this morning".
I began to look around for my CD case and couldn't find it. "Shit", I snapped. The full weight of what had happened began to settle in on me. "SHIT", I screamed, punching my seat in the process, "Shit, shit, shit, shit SHIT!"
I stormed into work, found a manager, and told them I needed to call the police. I edned up spending my lunch break filling a report at the station. It turned out to not be one of my better birthdays.

Now, despite my general optimism, I've got a sarcastic streak a mile wide. I'd remembered to take one of my CD cases in the night before, but had left the one in my car which contained my classic country collection (my pride and joy, truth be told. I'd spent a long time working on that collection, scrapping what money I had together to get it.). I don't know much about music theives; I can't put my self in the place of someone who's so sick in the head that he'd keif someone's collection like that. But, from what I gather of the sort, they are not the type that would want to listen to classic country; hard rock, sure. Rap? Definately. Metal? I suppose. But Classic Country? I would find that shocking.
So, this guy breaks into my car and manages to make off with the music that he'd be least likely to want. Even funnier, my copy of Offspring's Americana had been there as well, in its case. Now that, I figure, would be a CD the theif might enjoy. Except, the jackoff managed to drop that one into a snowbank as he made his escape! Some assholes just don't have any luck, I suppose. I wish I could feel bad for him.

Over the years since then, I'd managed to regain most of my collection, or at least get some CDs that replaced the music (even if they weren't the exact same album). There were a few, however, that I never managed to get my hands on. Either I'd simply forgotten that I had had that disk, I still thought I owned it somwhere, or my taste in music had changed. The later was the biggest factor; although I never ceased to be a Country fan, it got supplanted as I moved into other interests.
Well, a few days before my Birthday this year, I got the hankering to track down two or three of those old CDs. It took some digging aroudn town, and on iTunes, but I managed to get my hands on some of them. Most meaninful was "Timeless: a Tribute to Hank Williams" and "Dressed in Black", a tribute to Johnny Cash. I'd bought both CDs years before because of the presense of Hank III on them, and they had spent a lot of time spinning in my CD player.

Now, I don't know what it was, but having those old CDs really did me a lot of good. Its almost as if, having that old music back in my hands and hearing it for the first time in years, gave me some tangable link to my older self that had been sorely missing. IWhile listening to it, I felt the old smile crawl back onto my face, and I began to belt out these lyrics that I hadn't sung in so long.
Its funny, really. Most of the music I'm describing here, is happy in the least. Hank Sr could belt out a good party tune if he felt like it, but the best of his music has always been the tear jerkers. But, its always been this way with me; the sad music is always the stuff that makes me smile and makes me sing along. I've sometimes thought that its like a catharsis of sorts; if I'm feeling bad, being able to sing songs about others who've had it worse, flushes the negativity out of me and lets me move past it.
It was true back then and, apparently, its just as true now.

So, to make a long story short, I'm feeling a helluva lot better than I was even a week ago. I'm 26 years old now, and its going to be a good year! I'm in Grad School, I'm loving what I'm doing. Even more than that, though; I've finally remembered an old fact of late, which seems to have escaped me over the past three years. Namely: I _RULE_!! smile

I'm not in the least bit arrogant, of course tongue

Anyway, this journal is getting long, so let me sign off with a funny YOutube video that, not only is the most inspiration (non-Irish) song I know, but also meshed with a video that gives a beloved Children's movie a whole new meaning tongue



... is it bad that I always liked Scar, as a kid wink

Okay, time for episode 10 of the Tree-Splitter, for those who still care smile Just for fun, I've also included a few snippets of the original poetry from my epic. Look for it and tell me what you think (Hint: Its at the end biggrin )


The Tree-Splitter Episode 10
A Journey Ends, another Looms

SPOILERS! (Click to view)


While Sigismund lay, wounded and weak from the Wendigo's bite, he feel into a deep slumber. So tired was he from the battle, that he did not stir all night, even while the clouds descended and covered the land with a thin coating of white snow. This fluff, fell upon his prone form, melting with the heat of his skin, and gently washed the grime from his wounds.
All the while, the hero dreamed. He dreamt of his Father, embracing him as he had done as a boy, and congratulating him for his victories. He dreamt of the Chippewa people lavishing him witth gifts for ridding the northern realm of the curse which had fallen upon it so long ago. More so, however, he dreamt of lovely Winona, his bride to be. She came to him, the sun radiating from with her, and lay her hands upon his hurts which were then healed. She then nelt down and began to cover his face with the sweetest kisses he had ever known!

He awoke, when the great Sun first peaked its face up from under the horizon; a lone wolf was gently lapping at his face.
Sigismund let out of a groan of suprise and fright; the wolf paused in its chore, let out a howl, and lept away from the fallen man. It dissapeared into the brush and gave no more sign that it had ever been there; so lightly at the beast trode, that it had not even left prints in the freshly fallen snow.
Despite his pain and weakness, the hero grabbed a low hanging branch from the tree and began to pull himself up right, when he suddenly heard a commotion from the brush. For a panicked second, he was sure that the wolf had gone and retrieved its pack, and the group planned to make a meal of him yet.
But such fear was for nothing; within seconds a human figure came from the brush and let out a call to others. Soon a dozen of Sigismund's men came rushing into the clearing. Seeing their fallen leader, they ran to give him assistance, but he begged them off.
"I have fought against a demon, and have won; I think that that has earned me the right to stand on my own two feet!"
Slowly he pulled himself up and stood erect and tall in the morning light. Finding one of his hatchets lying in the snow, he grasped it and began to walk towards the form of the slain Wendigo, which still lay bloodied and buckled under the boughs on an old tree; obscenely splayed on the forest floor.
The men mutered as they saw the creature; they backed away slowly from it, unwilling to assume that their foe had finally been conquered by death.
But Sigismund did not back away; he strode closer. Kicking the form with gently with his good leg, he convicned himself that the beast was dead. And then, raising the hatchet above his head, he brought it down and neatly cleaved its head from its neck. A new gush of putrid ichor flowed from the wound onto the snow, where it froze into a blackish-green puddle.
"Come", Sigismund said, bidding his men to step forward, "This head is our trophy; a sign of the great victory that we won here last night. No longer will this craven beast hunt the Northwoods and feas on the flesh of men! Now, take this head and carry it with us; Winter has come, and we have no camp to dwell in this season; we need find a place to hold up."
The men took the head, passing it back and forth amongst themselves, each unwilling to hold it for more than a few minutes. In this way they made their way down from Timm's Hill and to their tents below. There Sigismund found a large oaken trunk and had them toss the head inside, where he safely locked it away from prying eyes.

They broke camp later that day and began their trek; they found their way to the small hamlet of Spirit which lay near by. There they found rooms at a local inn, and stayed there all winter, making themselves useful to the local town folk to pay for the room and board. However, they spoke not a word about their adventures in the forest, or the beast they had slain; the Wendigo's skull lay safely locked away during that entire time, and no one was allowed to see it.
They stayed in Spirit all winter long, until the snows had melted and the the green grass grew anew upon the fields, and the trees once again sprouted new bud-leaves. At that time, Sigismund had a dream where he was visited by Winona, his beloved. He heard her singing a song, lightly as she walked along the shores of Old La Pointe where here people were camped.

She Sang: "Oh when will I wed, and wear a ring
Drink the draught or desire fulfilled
I long for my lover, my Lumber-man
To take me to the trees, to treasure me
No field-sower, No farmer for me
I long for the love of my lumber man"

At hearing these words, Sigismund awoke with a start and knew that the time for rest had ended. He Gathered his men and they made the long trek, Northwards, to the Chippewa camp at La Point.

Of their journey, the Ballads have this to say:

Awaking in wonder, and wasting of love
Sigismund forsook tiny Spirit-town.
With his loyal lumbers he labored Northward
To old La Point the Pine Prince came
To find his fianc and feel her embrace
To marry that maiden, and make her his wife.

Gitchie-Gumi the glorious waters
Heard of the hero and his happy-quest
Saw him speeding with his storied band
And gave him a gift, granted his prayers
Her waters welcomed the Wendigo-killer
And carried his craft of kindly seas
Baring his birch-barks to the blissful shores

The gulls also graced the great warrior
They took his tale and told them to
The friendly folk who favored Sigismund
And the beautiful bride who bade him near

When the birch backs beached on the shores
And the Lumber lord leapt to the sands
The heavenly the Huntress hasted to his arms
Sigismund smiled then sank to one knee
"Oh, magical maid of the misty wood
She who holds my heart in her very hands
To beseech your to be my bride and wife.:
I've felled the foe who froze the souls
Of many men, mighty in courage
But it brings me, no brilliant joys.
If you'd receive my ring, wrought by Wheland,
I'd promise my princess, to ply my blades
'gainst any goblin, great or small
No more. To make her merry and light."

The forest fey, favored Sigismund
And kindly kissed the courageous knight
Laying her lips lightly upon
The forest man's forehead, and smiled
A smile so strong, it seemed the sun
Burnt and blazed no brighter than that!

"The minds of men are a mystery to me!
They go to their graves with a gallant shout
Waging their wars, worrying of nothing
Their lives meaning less than loyalty and honor.
And yet, they yelp, in yellow fright
Their tails tucked between trembling legs
When faced with the frightful and fearsome thought
Of a little lass, loathsome with rage!"
The green grasses grew as she laughed.

"You fear I'll fail, to fulfill my vows
And abandon my bonnie, for bravely doing
That job which brings joy to his heart?
A wicked woman, my warrior thinks me!
No, Blond Beard was bred for the trees
To log the lumber and lay low his foes.
My heart it his, and happy I wish him!"

Then Sigismund smiled and stared to her eyes
Made of the emeralds of Mother Nature.
"Winona is a wonder; it hurts to gaze
On this green goddess whose glance could
Hurl me to hell, with a hurtful word
But bravely I'll bound to the bed of marriage
To flee that fate, is fearsome indeed!"

Then raising a ring of rosy gold
He placed that precious promise-band
On her fairest finger, with formal grace
"My heart it hungers, for Hurit alone!
I'll desire this damsel til my days are done
Where once we were two we walk as one."

Then that dazzling doe dropped to his arms
"The sound of my soul is Sigismund's name
My blood beats to be by his side
'til my death day, I'll desire no other
Where once we were two we walk as one".

Then the couple kissed, with careless abandon
While the birds blessed their bliss with song
The winds whispered their wild laughter
And the Giver, glowed in the gloomless sky

Then the saw-men sang their songs with glee
They drank draughts of dream-water, gold
Caroling their king with cutting songs


But, sorrow always lurks in the old songs. Perhaps the fact that men lived larger in those days, experiencing such great joys and excitements, meant that their sorrows were magnified as well. For, although Sigismund's greatest victory was behind him, his fall still lay in the future. And so, we are told:

But behind the belting of the boisterous song
Weird was weaving, it wove its tapestry
That loom of life never lingering
Pitiless, unpausing; its pace never slowing
Foretelling the fall of the Forestman
Killed by his kindred in compassion and love

But that tale's best told another time I feel
When blood is boiling and begging for songs
Of fearless families, and fearsome villains
Of sorrowful sons and sordid beasts
Of weeping wendigos and willful fate

So, lets listen here to the laughter and song
Taking our turn with tankards of beer
Dancing 'til dawn, and drunk with merry
For fickle is fate, and fleeting is joy
It should be shared; should it not?


And yes; believe it or not: To Be Continued tongue

VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
ravioli:
u havent updated in a while.....
FYI lol
also you are always on late and are in the nocturnal group
you should come into psw chat sometime*
it will feed your bad sleeping habit!



*sometime as in when i am actually in there, which sadly just passed by.
Apr 20, 2008
ravioli:
im pretty peachy but thats a given with me most days
biggrin blush
yes yes come into chat late nights it always a rather amusing time just make sure you go to the PSW room tab because main chat is down right icky wink
Apr 21, 2008

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