danipoo

Sometimes being optimistic sucks. I'm tired of looking on the bright side. I want to wallow in my misery. At least for now.
I found out today that I am leaving for Afghanistan for several months sometime this Spring. The deployment part isn't what I am upset about. That's an accepted occupational hazard. It's the motherfucking timing that I have a huge issue with. I finally met my equal, who happens to be a badass who works in Iraq most of the year, and he's due to come home around the same time that I am leaving. This also shouldn't be an issue, but this is a new and developing relationship. Whatever one on one time we get together is mad important. We met face to face in December after a few months of internet communication and hit it off terrifically. I don't want our prolonged separation to affect the development of what I feel is complete awesomeness.
So yeah, I'm freaking a bit. I keep telling myself that if he feels that I am worth it, then he'll wait. He says he will and not to worry so much. I feel he's totally worth waiting for, but I also feel that the floor is going to drop out from under me at any moment.
this whole situation will pan out exactly how it's supposed to, but right now...I feel like I am going to explode.