Oyyyy. It's always a mess when I disappear over to the girlfriend's place for a few days. I come back, there's so much livejournal and sg to catch up on, it's crazy. So yes, I've been there since new year's day, not doing much at all. Her being a teacher and me making my own hours, we've both had since Christmas off to do nothing. I haven't stepped outside in three days. It was good to get out of there and come back home. I'm just one of those people that needs space, I am... but she isn't. She could be attached at the hip for a week or more and have no problem. Me...? Not so much.
ANYWAY...
My big ugly news of late is that the modest little theatre company that I've been pouring myself into for the past 4 years, created from nothing, and have actually had some moderate success in managing is crashing to the ground in pieces. There's a board of 9 of us that handle all the operations, and of that board, 6 may be moving/have moved and 1 feels he needs to explore other directions, which leaves me and my technical director, Pat.
And we started our company under the idea of a youth theatre company, for youth, by youth... because in our area, there really were no opportunities for young people to excel in theatre. We always got the shitty jobs, the shitty parts.
So we did it ourselves.
But now, I'm too old to stick on, and I'd hoped to be able to pass it on to a new generation... so we held interviews for people to replace some members (we used to think we were only losing 2-5 people total), and they just didn't pan out. Just not enough competent people in the area.
So, my theatre company is dissolving.
The good news is that Pat and I will most likely be working on something new very soon. The board decided that the remainder of the funds in our treasury would be best spent helping to fund the new theatre project, so that will at least start us out.
The bad news, of course, is that it's ending, which isa very emotional thing for all of us, and for me in particular. I was the leader of our little band of misfits. I don't quite know what to say or do. I hope that doesn't sound too dramatic or stupid. Because maybe I should, since this happened before, in a smaller way with my last company, since that one was there before me, and is still there now. But this one... this was different. This one I helped create myself, out of nothing, out of 9 people with a vision, all of them unsure and scared. Where for the first time people listened to me and believed in me and trusted fully in me. And it was just different than anything else.
So needless to say, that fucking SUCKS. For a while I'll just concentrate on the correctional worker side of my life, I guess, until Pat and I really get a good plan together.
And the new company will be good too, but nothing will ever quite be as good as this one was. We were all great friends, and yet, it all still worked very well, on the business side of it, and you just don't see that. So it really meant that 'work' meant hanging out with my friends three nights a week. Hard to beat something like that.
I am excited about starting over, however. Very much so. I love starting new enterprises like this. New challenges. Why oh why do I love challenges so much?
Weird.
Anyway, I have many journals and other things to catch up on, and I've already written more than an eyeful, so.....
EDIT:
Whoa, sitting here listening to NIN's With Teeth again, I totally just flashed back to when I was in a bad techno-rock band in high school. And remembered why I enjoyed it so much.
Man, those were the days...
ANYWAY...
My big ugly news of late is that the modest little theatre company that I've been pouring myself into for the past 4 years, created from nothing, and have actually had some moderate success in managing is crashing to the ground in pieces. There's a board of 9 of us that handle all the operations, and of that board, 6 may be moving/have moved and 1 feels he needs to explore other directions, which leaves me and my technical director, Pat.
And we started our company under the idea of a youth theatre company, for youth, by youth... because in our area, there really were no opportunities for young people to excel in theatre. We always got the shitty jobs, the shitty parts.
So we did it ourselves.
But now, I'm too old to stick on, and I'd hoped to be able to pass it on to a new generation... so we held interviews for people to replace some members (we used to think we were only losing 2-5 people total), and they just didn't pan out. Just not enough competent people in the area.
So, my theatre company is dissolving.
The good news is that Pat and I will most likely be working on something new very soon. The board decided that the remainder of the funds in our treasury would be best spent helping to fund the new theatre project, so that will at least start us out.
The bad news, of course, is that it's ending, which isa very emotional thing for all of us, and for me in particular. I was the leader of our little band of misfits. I don't quite know what to say or do. I hope that doesn't sound too dramatic or stupid. Because maybe I should, since this happened before, in a smaller way with my last company, since that one was there before me, and is still there now. But this one... this was different. This one I helped create myself, out of nothing, out of 9 people with a vision, all of them unsure and scared. Where for the first time people listened to me and believed in me and trusted fully in me. And it was just different than anything else.
So needless to say, that fucking SUCKS. For a while I'll just concentrate on the correctional worker side of my life, I guess, until Pat and I really get a good plan together.
And the new company will be good too, but nothing will ever quite be as good as this one was. We were all great friends, and yet, it all still worked very well, on the business side of it, and you just don't see that. So it really meant that 'work' meant hanging out with my friends three nights a week. Hard to beat something like that.
I am excited about starting over, however. Very much so. I love starting new enterprises like this. New challenges. Why oh why do I love challenges so much?
Weird.
Anyway, I have many journals and other things to catch up on, and I've already written more than an eyeful, so.....
EDIT:
Whoa, sitting here listening to NIN's With Teeth again, I totally just flashed back to when I was in a bad techno-rock band in high school. And remembered why I enjoyed it so much.
Man, those were the days...
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
synnove:
jam packed with an emotional rollercoaster ride = MY JOURNAL.
amily:
Typically it refers to the first, but if you play your cards right the possibilities are endless!