Well, day one of vacation brought me a trip to the doctor's office. More on that in a bit.
First, my father and I (in a rare moment of us bonding) head to the bank so he can give me $40 that he owes me (I think I have $1 left). I get the money and head to my doctor's appointment, but first, I stop off at the local AM/PM to pick me up a pack of smokes, and a couple bottles of Sobe.
I walk into the office (which is adjacent to a hospital, who stiffed me a while back, but that's another story) and it's completely crowded with Russians.....and none of them speak English. One tried to hold a conversation with me, and all I could do was nod my head and say, "Uh yeah." to each thing they were saying....Right then and there I wish I had my brass knucks so I could knock this person the fuck out!
My name gets called, after I pay my $15 co-pay, fill out the mandatory physical paper. The first thing I get to do was get myself weighed....so, what do I get to do, empty my pockets (cargo pants no less): Cigarettes, lighter, cell phone, $3 in change, my wallet, my CD Player. The nurse looked at me like I was insane. The final weight: 160
She then took my temp, and for some reason, in 80+ degree weather, I am wearing a black shirt, been walking 6 blocks, and was sweating like a pig, so I figured my temp would be above normal....it was below normal, which was odd.
The nurse then walks me into the exam room, and tells me that the doc will be with me in a minute. Now, the one thing I regret about this clinic is my favorite doctor is gone. Damn, i would've loved to get with her!
The doc finally comes in and introduces himself, and we get started with the physical. Now, for some reason, he wants me to have a cholesterol test...at 25!?!?!? Ok, if he says so.....he does the "turn your head and cough" bit, which sucked. Nothing worse for a straight man, than to have his balls fondled by another man. It just made me cringe....but that wasn't the worse.
The next thing I knew, the doc was puttin KY on his finger and told me to bend over, and with that, I felt him push two fingers up my ass, and I was in pain! I wanted to kill this guy now!! How DARE he violate me like that!
But, he did check out my shoulder, and no damage was done to that (The only highlight of this trip). I walked out of this clinic (walking a bit funny now, mind you) with prescriptions for Zantac and Rhinocort....and he wants to take me off Paxil now....this guy is really asking for it now...
The rest of the day, I slept, until some motherfucker calls my house at 10:00 and wants to look at the Bronco I have for sale....how odd....so, I start grabbin stuff: Chain, brass knucks, mace, knife. Who in their right mind would want to look at a car this late at night?
So, I go with my father down to the place we were to meet the guy. The guy, and his friend show up, and I was ready for anything. The guy looked a combo of half-drunk, and half-retarded. I think he was just plain stupid. His friend knew I wasn't gonna fuck around if he and his buddy decided to lift the truck from me and my old man....
Well, nothing happend, and here I am, writing all of you. So, until next time....have fun.
Mikey
(P.S. I may have to go to work for the hell of it to get some stories, what do you all think? Give me some feedback....later)
First, my father and I (in a rare moment of us bonding) head to the bank so he can give me $40 that he owes me (I think I have $1 left). I get the money and head to my doctor's appointment, but first, I stop off at the local AM/PM to pick me up a pack of smokes, and a couple bottles of Sobe.
I walk into the office (which is adjacent to a hospital, who stiffed me a while back, but that's another story) and it's completely crowded with Russians.....and none of them speak English. One tried to hold a conversation with me, and all I could do was nod my head and say, "Uh yeah." to each thing they were saying....Right then and there I wish I had my brass knucks so I could knock this person the fuck out!
My name gets called, after I pay my $15 co-pay, fill out the mandatory physical paper. The first thing I get to do was get myself weighed....so, what do I get to do, empty my pockets (cargo pants no less): Cigarettes, lighter, cell phone, $3 in change, my wallet, my CD Player. The nurse looked at me like I was insane. The final weight: 160
She then took my temp, and for some reason, in 80+ degree weather, I am wearing a black shirt, been walking 6 blocks, and was sweating like a pig, so I figured my temp would be above normal....it was below normal, which was odd.
The nurse then walks me into the exam room, and tells me that the doc will be with me in a minute. Now, the one thing I regret about this clinic is my favorite doctor is gone. Damn, i would've loved to get with her!
The doc finally comes in and introduces himself, and we get started with the physical. Now, for some reason, he wants me to have a cholesterol test...at 25!?!?!? Ok, if he says so.....he does the "turn your head and cough" bit, which sucked. Nothing worse for a straight man, than to have his balls fondled by another man. It just made me cringe....but that wasn't the worse.
The next thing I knew, the doc was puttin KY on his finger and told me to bend over, and with that, I felt him push two fingers up my ass, and I was in pain! I wanted to kill this guy now!! How DARE he violate me like that!
But, he did check out my shoulder, and no damage was done to that (The only highlight of this trip). I walked out of this clinic (walking a bit funny now, mind you) with prescriptions for Zantac and Rhinocort....and he wants to take me off Paxil now....this guy is really asking for it now...
The rest of the day, I slept, until some motherfucker calls my house at 10:00 and wants to look at the Bronco I have for sale....how odd....so, I start grabbin stuff: Chain, brass knucks, mace, knife. Who in their right mind would want to look at a car this late at night?
So, I go with my father down to the place we were to meet the guy. The guy, and his friend show up, and I was ready for anything. The guy looked a combo of half-drunk, and half-retarded. I think he was just plain stupid. His friend knew I wasn't gonna fuck around if he and his buddy decided to lift the truck from me and my old man....
Well, nothing happend, and here I am, writing all of you. So, until next time....have fun.
Mikey
(P.S. I may have to go to work for the hell of it to get some stories, what do you all think? Give me some feedback....later)
And she was kinda cute too... I think we had "a moment".. She did juggled my nads and stick a couple fingers up my butt.
She never called me back though....