daem

week 3 of being sober. Next wednesday night it's done. It's starting to get to me somewhat. I stop and kinda wish i had that fucked up feeling of the room spinning to set me on my way. Idleness is the worst. That's half the reason i drink, to calm my head and numb me to thinkiing etc. But there is no soothing now. I feel more aggressive with no energy to put anywhere. I've been smoking a little more than usual.

So far I've almost driving myself to ruin: Gambling, drinking, all i need now is a woman and i'll speed down the road to demise. Life can be sweet sometimes.